Son discovers his parents are paying "struggling" brother's NYC rent, but soon learns his brother has secretly saved thousands of dollars from their funding, so he tells their father, sparking family drama: '[Dad's] thinking of reducing the amount'

Author image for Emma Saven
Emma Saven
Dec 7, 2025 8:00 PM EST

I don't think being financially taken advantage of by their own son was on this sweet couple's Bingo card…At least not until this man exposed his brother's sneaky saving tendencies…These parents have two sons: one who is financially stable (six-figures-stable to be precise) and another, younger son who claims to be "struggling" to make ends meet. So, as any caring parent who's recently come into some family money, they offer to pay their younger son's rent in New York City. Nothing luxurious, but still a very generous offer…

However, the more his older brother sits with this information, the more he struggles to shake the feeling that their unhesitant contribution just isn't fair. He's never needed help, or even asked for it, but for some reason, he still thought that having them pay his adult brother's rent just didn't sit right with him…and it seems as though he was correct for trusting his intuition…Because, after speaking with his young brother, he discovered that he had saved tens of thousands of dollars from their parents 'apartment funding' without anyone's knowledge of his deceitful piggy bank! 

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  • This older brother knew he had to tell their father about his brother’s suspicious behavior, even if it meant his brother’s allowance might be reduced, which realistically had nothing to do with him. He simply wanted his parents to have all the relevant information so they could make their own decisions… 

  • Parents calculating costs while son excitedly holds cash
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    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • AITA for telling my dad that my brother he’s been supporting has been saving money?

    My family didn't have a ton of money growing up. We certainly weren't poor but my brother (26M) and I (32M) both went to school on a lot of financial aid and a lot of holes were patched with credit card debt, which generally left the two of us pretty anxious about money growing up.
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  • After college I graduated and was lucky to get a good paying job, but my younger brother graduated from college after Covid and even after going to grad school has been having a really hard time finding a good full time job in his field.
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  • He's been working hard in a part time service job that he often has to be at around 5 am, but it's not enough to live on in NYC even with a roommate.
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  • Luckily, my parents came into some money from a relative passing and have been able to support him and help him pay the rent, which I've had no issues with until recently.
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  • A few months ago, I learned offhand that my brother was saving and actually had quite a lot in savings.
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  • And by a lot, I mean tens of thousands of dollars. I also found out that my parents were supporting him a lot more than I thought.
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  • I assumed they were paying part of his rent, but they're actually paying all of it and then some.
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  • I'd been feeling weird about it and finally asked my dad, why he was giving my brother that much in support if he was able to save after paying living expenses and apparently my dad didn't know he'd been saving.
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  • Excited man holding 100 dollar bills
    via sydaproductions

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Now I think he's thinking of reducing the amount my brother gets. I've never gotten money from my parents except for help with a down payment that I repaid them with interest.
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  • The thing is I really don't need help. I have a very comfortable six- figure job that I worked hard to get, but is probably objectively less taxing than my brother's job.
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  • It feels petty given the circumstances to worry about the money my brother is getting when he's not being lazy and is certainly not living a life of luxury with it.
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  • At the same time, I can't shake the feeling of something being unfair about my brother getting tens of thousands of dollars a year from my parents in support while I'm getting nothing, even though I really don't want anything from them.
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  • Now I'm worried that my brother is going to think I'm the AH for getting his support reduced when at the end of the day, the money makes a much bigger difference to him than to me.
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  • AITA for not just keeping my mouth shut? EDIT: I should clarify because I want to give a clear picture of the situation that when I said came into "some money", I really meant a lot of money.
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  • Enough that giving my brother this money isn't imposing any kind of hardship or burden on them.
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  • Doesn't necessarily change the morality of the situation but didn't want people thinking that my brother was knowingly imposing any hardship on my parents.
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  • Two men arguing on the couch
    via peopleinmotion

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • ReadMeDrMemory NTA for alerting your parents to the fact that your brother is exploiting them. It's a little less than wonderful that you describe this more as an issue of unfairness because of them supporting him but not you.
    via ReadMeDrMemory
  • OP throwaway2024102501 You're not wrong. I really don't love that that was my reaction either.
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  • LdiJ46 NTA If your brother actually has tens of thousands in savings he clearly doesn't need tens of thousands a year from your parents in support. I am sure that he needs some, but clearly not that much.
    via LdiJ46
  • Heraclius404 Nta. You did a sensible thing asking why. You didn't tell on him in any way, you weren't keeping a secret. If your father didn't know, or reduces aid, that's not on you.
    via Heraclius404
  • BDizzMcNizz NTA. Your brother was taking advantage of your parents' kindness. You would be TA if you didn't say anything.
    via BDizzMcNizz
  • Major_Specific127 Whatever money they are spending to support a child who doesn't need it would be better used to grow savings for their old age. The cost of being alive and elderly is going up by the minute and even a windfall inherited years ago may not be enough to cover costs. Unless your parents and brother have an understanding that he will take care of them in their old age in exchange for extended support now, he shouldn't be depleting their nest egg unnecessarily.
    via Major_Specific127

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