Mom criticizes ex-husband for playing Fortnite with their 10-year-old son while she has custody of him

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
May 27, 2026 12:30 PM EDT

She doesn't want her ex spending time with him when it's her turn to have him at her house. 

Co-parenting 50-50 with your ex can be incredibly difficult. First of all, how are you supposed to split the time? Do the kids live at your house one week, and their other parent's house the next week? Are they moving back and forth between houses every three to four days? Either way, it's a recipe for your kids living out of a suitcase, and that can be stressful for everyone involved. 

Some parents are hyperfixated on making sure that everything is equal between their house and their ex's house. The father doesn't want their kids to dread coming over to his house because he doesn't have all of the toys that mom has, so he stocks up on toys and games. The mom doesn't want their kids referring to dad as "the fun parent," so she makes sure that she takes her kids to as many, if not more, baseball games as he takes them to. This kind of competitive parenting can be stressful for kids because they can tell their parents care more about one-upping their ex than about paying attention to them. 

The mom and dad in this story both might be guilty of that crime. The dad plays online video games with his son while he's at his mom's house, in part because his mom doesn't know how to play them. The dad claims that he's only doing it to make his son happy, but he also seems to enjoy getting a rise out of his ex-wife. You can judge him for yourself! Maybe you think the mom is the unreasonable one. 

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  • Two models represent a dad playing video games with his son, even though his ex-wife doesn't support it.
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    Two models represent a dad playing video games with his son, even though his ex-wife doesn't support it.

  • Am I the bad guy for playing videogames with my kid when he is at his mom's house?

    My son is 10 and I have 50% custody of him. When he is at his mom's, he often calls me up to play fortnight with him which I usually end up doing with him. His mother mentioned it to me as
    via u/itcouldbeyoubut
  • something she isn't happy with and I basically told her to get over it or learn how to play herself. I don't even play videogames unless it's with the kid and the kid is going to be playing
    via u/itcouldbeyoubut
  • regardless if I hop on or not, so it's not about limiting his time playing, she just doesn't want him playing with me.
    via u/itcouldbeyoubut
  • A woman who could be angry about her ex-husband playing video games with his son while he's at her house.
    via engin akyurt

    A woman who could be angry about her ex-husband playing video games with his son while he's at her house. 

  • james_t_woods Yes and no. I do this with my son, but I make sure I don't take up all of his time - his mum is ok with it, but has had to speak to us when it got to 2+ hours a day Just be respectful with time and communicate - and don't be a about it
    via u/james_t_woods
  • Elite Joz If the kid is playing games all day anyway, it shouldn't matter who he plays with.
    via u/EliteJoz
  • james_t_woods Has OP said that's what happens? If that's the case, then that puts a different spin on it, but the lad should be discouraged from gaming so much
    via u/james_t_woods
  • YajirobeBeanDaddy >the kid is going to play regardless if I hop on with him or not Implies that the kid isn't playing any longer than he normally would if OP wasn't playing with him
    via u/YajirobeBeanDaddy
  • marylander NTJ for playing games with him, YTJ for how you're communicating based on just your short retelling of how the convo went.
    via u/marylander_
  • CopperlessFrost The gaming itself isn't really the issue, but the way the conversation happened probably made everything worse than it needed to be
    via u/CopperlessFrost
  • Doctorbig 287 Clearly she also would like to get that quality time with him, without having to be a controlling mom by not allowing him to play. OP if you read this you should work out a solution that includes her and doesn't punish the kid. it is wonderful to have that quality time with a kid, and she probably wants to feel involved to the same degree. Whatever your feelings are on her, you will have to work with her for 8 more years at least, so the sooner you can see her as an ally and not an
    via u/Doctorbig287
  • Maybe look for games that all three of you can play, like minecraft. Or consider finding interests that all of you share (you don't have to do them at the same time, but there is no reason to chose things that she would not participate in.) Additionally, you can foster the interests that she is building with the kid during your time, even if it is not time-based. Like if she is reading with him, you could take him to get books to read at her house. It helps the kid to feel like you both want to
    via u/Doctorbig287
  • Styx-n-String It's the custodial parent's responsibility to find ways to connect and spend time with their child when the kid is with them. If Mom doesn't want her son to play video games with Dad on her time, that's completely valid, but then she needs to find ways to spend quality time with her child herself. She could learn to play games, or pick up another hobby with him that they can share (for example when my niece is with their dad, they play games, when they're with their mom, they do ji
    via u/Styx-n-String
  • A representation of two little girls putting a jigsaw puzzle together when they're at their mom's house.
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    A representation of two little girls putting a jigsaw puzzle together when they're at their mom's house. 

  • Of course, Dad isn't wrong for accepting an invitation to play with his son. For all he knows, Mom is making dinner or doing something else and told her son to go play. But if Mom wants her home and her company to be more compelling than the video games, it's on her to make spending time with her more interesting so their son will be too busy to play with Dad.
    via u/Styx-n-String
  • Embarrassed-Bad-3118 I can't stand when (some) dads talk about the mother of their child like she's a nagging annoying little nuisance, and nothing more. It says SO much about the guy, and how he feels he could call the shots by default because he deliberately postures himself as if he is inherently superior to her.
    via u/Embarrassed-Bad-3118
  • Solacen 1105 A simple "ask your mom if she has any plans then we can play for a bit”. I would be upset if my parenting time played second fiddle to like my ex spouse binge watching our daughters favorite show with her. Not a good feeling.
    via u/Solacen1105
  • Miami Morgendorffer This first part! "Check in with mom, maybe she has something planned for you two" is really important. Also, there should be activities that mom and son also enjoy together that are just for them. These should be allowed whether he's with you or not. So, for example, if their thing is going to the movies on opening night when he's excited about a new release, he should be able to go with her and not you, even if opening night is your night with him. If her thing with him is g
    via u/Miami_Morgendorffer
  • or having strict It's not about being a j scheduling, it's about each of you independently having a strong bond with your child, and each of you supporting that for the other. Mom is doing a poor job of expressing that she needs more bonding time with her son, and you're doing a poor job of asking if you're infringing on bonding experiences by immediately going with the child's impulse.
    via u/Miami_Morgendorffer
  • itcouldbeyoubut OP Who the h I talks like that? Lol
    via u/itcouldbeyoubut
  • Miami_Morgendorffer Mature adults who care about equal parenting for the greater benefit of their child. If you're not mature, or not an adult, or you don't care about parenting equally, or you're not focused on the greater benefit for your child, then yeah you're the j
    via u/Miami_Morgendorffer
  • craziness-69 He's not interested in having a harmonious relationship with his ex. He's only interested in bashing her and manipulating his son into thinking she's a problem in their relationship.
    via u/craziness-69
  • itcouldbeyoubut OP It's just not a realistic dialogue lol
    via u/itcouldbeyoubut

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fortnite kid dad ex wife argument video games ex husband mom son custody
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