Bizarre Tinder Nightmares To Make Your Eyes Roll Extra Hard

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mattstaff
Sep 16, 2019 1:30 PM EDT

What a time to be alive. And to think that people say romance is dead...

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  • 01
    Text - * 25% 4:13 PM l AT&T LTE < YOU MATCHED WITH ELLIOTT ON 8/8/18 I hear you like Mickey Mouse? You're gonna love the view from Dis-knees
    via tindernightmares
  • 02
    Text - YOU MATCHED WITH BRIAN ON 4/23/17 Bj? Today 2:11 PM How successful has this been? It hasn't Lol Not surprised Sent So what's up
    via tindernightmares
  • 03
    Text - YOU MATCHED WIT 2018-07-28 If I were a gardener l'd plant my tulips and your tulips together Today 11:14 AM Might as well dig 6ft deeper and jump in Sent
    via tindernightmares
  • 04
    Text - ON 8/7/18 YOU MATCHED WITH I like your face Hahaha thank you Sent you can sit on mine if you'd like
    via tindernightmares
  • 05
    Text - YOU MATCHED WITH TOM ON 27/7/18. Hey hey i heard your looking for a stud, cause ive got the std and all i need is U..... Today 5:58 pm Already got one of those Std or a stud??? I'll keep you guessing Sent
    via tindernightmares
  • 06
    Text - Heavenly blessed beauty, if permitted I would ravish you with force far greater than that contained within Thor's hammer.
    via tindernightmares
  • 07
    Text - Today 2:31 PM Let's fuck Today 3:02 PM -ing never talk to each other again Sent
    via tindernightmares
  • 08
    Text - Verizon 4:35 P 84%% YOU MATCHED WITH RYAN ON 6/27/18 This may sound like I'm fucking with you but I'm not. I was recently diagnosed with a thermal disease called cyroaudiovascularmexia. (Google it if ya want) Essentially I don't get enough blood flow to my ears so they are slowly freezing and they will soon fall off and it will spread to my inner ear and brain. There is no cure, but there is one treatment. I need to warm my ears constantly to save my ears and the only material soft enough
    via tindernightmares
  • 09
    Text - YOU MATCHED WITH MITCHELL ON 7/6/18 Wyd tonight Sat, Jul 7, 10:59 PM probs not you Sent Sat, Jul 7, 11:36 PM Fair enough
    via tindernightmares
  • 10
    Text - YOU MATCHED WITH MATT ON 7/22/18 Imagine this: You go to the grocery store one day as you normally do to get groceries. You grab your basket asnormal and head down the asile at your leisure. You suddenly see me standing in the isle holding a lot of limes. You think, "Why is this cute guy holding so many limes?" I look at you, startled because I think, "Why is this cute girl looking at me?" I instantly make a move towards you, slip, drop all my limes. As they hit the floor I look up in hor
    via tindernightmares
  • 11
    Text - 9:34 PM ll Verizon LTE 45% ell 13/18 YOU MATCHED WITH You don't know what I would do to you Today 4:27 PM Take me out to dinner and treat me with respect? Sent
    via tindernightmares
  • 12
    Text - Thursday 1:25 AM I went to my doctor, got some bad news.. Thursday 9:47 PM Hmm? Thursday 10:29 PM I am healthy, but I am lacking vitamin U Friday 11:51 AM Oh joy
    via tindernightmares

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tinder cringe apps relationships ridiculous dating
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