CheezCake

20 Tinder Profiles And Messages That Made Us Laugh

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  • 1

    "I don't smoke but I thought it made me look cool... I was wrong"

    tinder fail - Outerwear - Gareth 22 8259 miles away I don't smoke but I thought it made me look cool... I was wrong.
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  • 2

    Take it a step back

    tinder fail - Text - l AT&T @ 1 66% 1:59 AM < Jacelyn Yesterday 3:26 PM I try;) Yesterday 10:56 PM You husband material? I think the better question is if 1'm friend material first You're moving a little fast for me Jacelyn Oh okay I'll take a step back You human material? Yesterday 11:40 PM Well do have the tendency to take myself out for walks and bark at strangers but for the most part I'd say yeah I'm human Sent Send Type a message GIF
  • 3

    10/10 would date

    tinder fail - Headgear - 41 miles away active 1 day ago Nathan, 21 About Nathan Married. Couple of kids. Looking for some side action. Just kidding. Single. 3 tamagotchi's. Looking for someone to bring to family events so they'll stop thinking something's wrong with me.
  • 4

    "It's my first language..."

    tinder fail - Text - 88% 15:59 Joy Online 49 mins ago Today hi your attractive and handsome My attractive and handsome what? Read can you speak English F Report Type a message... Aa Send 3 lR Learn more Inredile haIncredible!ndia Ad
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  • 5

    Couldn't have gone better!

    tinder fail - Product - 1:49 .l LTE Wednesday 5:38 PM or, a better question, on a scale of one to America how free are you this weekend? Wednesday 5:57 PM I'm like a 1773 America because I'm not totally free but I kind of am I'm stunned at how good of a response that is. Wednesday 6:14 PM Thanks, I thought it was kind of bad but also good Well when are you gonna be like a July 4th, 1776 America so that I can take you out and make more bad/good puns with you Wednesday 6:59 PM Wanna do Saturday?
  • 6

    For the giraffes

    tinder fail - Text - Hanna The tallest giraffe ever recorded was a Masai bull named George. George stood at 19ft and his horns almost grazed the roof of the 20ft high giraffe house when he was 9 years old. He arrived at Chester Zoo from Kenya in January 1959 and died July 1969 Today 10:06 PM How'd you know I made a tinder to learn more about giraffes? I mean I thought that's what this app was for Anyone who says otherwise should be blocked immediately Alright excuse me while I go block about 90%
  • 7

    "She was looking down a lot in her pics"

    tinder fail - Text - 0LTE 49% 1:58 Monday 10:24 PM What exactly is on the floor to make you look down so much? It must be pretty awesome. my standards That bad huh? Sent Type a message... GIF
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  • 8

    Little spoon and big spoon

    tinder fail - Text - AT&T Wi-Fi 20:24 1 46% < Kristen Hey there! Howdy! I need your help Wiiith? T have all these tiny forks and knives, and now all I need is a little spoon Well luckily for you, this little spoon is looking for a big spoon! Well allow me to offer my services What is guaranteed with your services? Disappointment and instant regret Sent Type a message Send GIF
  • 9

    Those are some really nice chests

    tinder fail - Suitcase - Ok send me your pic of chest U like? Your body pic Body chest pic Uhhh ok u mean like this? Aa (O
  • 10

    Registered to vote

    tinder fail - Text - 91% 00:12 LIGE Angela Wednesday 22:11 Hey babe are you registered to vote? Wednesday 23:50 no Damn I guess you don't care about your future, let's have unprotected sex Today 00:12 um what Type a message... GIF
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  • 11

    Free poptart

    tinder fail - Text - LTE 30% 10:08 AM Today 9:27 AM Can i borrow a dollar? For what lol I didn't eat breakfast yet and l want to buy a poptart from the vending machine Lol you're funny Isn't this app for asking for things that probably won't happen? Uhh i don't think so lol Today 10:08 AM. Okay perfect! When are we going to hook up then? Sent Type a message... GIF
  • 12

    "This is someone I was matched with"

    tinder fail - Text - Vasily Professional Slav at Mother Russia 3 miles away Privet! Professional Slav here looking for some cheeki breeki people to squat with. If your heels are to the sky then swipe left, you Western spy! I make that good borscht and babushka's jam Vodka is a plus 1 Instagram Photo VIEW MORE ON INSTAGRAM O Connect Share your Instagram photos, too RECOMMEND VASILY TO A FRIEND REPORT VASILY
  • 13

    Best pickup line

    tinder fail - Text - 33% 0 9:25 PM Kate Today 9:21 PM Your bio is the best pickup line I've heard Do you mind if I use it?! Haha it works a treat, go nuts! Is this the Hogwarts express? Cause it feels like you and I are headed somewhere magical... Wow, it feels pretty great to be on the receiving end! Perfect execution Thanks, I came up with it myself Sent Type a message... GIF
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  • 14

    Sadly relatable

    tinder fail - Text - Today 3:16 AM You seem chill. Wanna awkwardly make small talk for a few days while I try my best to hijack our conversation to make it more sexual than it needs to be and convince you to meet up and have awkward first-day sex to some 80%+ movie on Netflix. Followed by occasional awkward snapchats that fade into never speaking again and then wondering, "Why do I care about this person's life?" when we see each others stories?
  • 15

    "I think I'm witnessing someone being beamed to death"

    tinder fail - Photo caption - 10:02 Nicole 20 e University of Rochester 3 miles away X
  • 16

    It just keeps getting worse

    tinder fail - Text - James 31 7 miles away I'm brutally honest, but I lie a lot. Will cheat on you, often. No job. 5 kids, 4 baby mamas. 2 felonies, 1 bad drop away from a 3rd. No car. 6'2 with abs Thinking about getting a face tattoo. I'll take your cash from your purse. Sleeping on my home bois couch atm, times are tough Looking for a real ride or die chick, cause I ain't going back to jail.
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  • 17

    Was not expected that

    tinder fail - Text - 4G 75% 12:06 AM your cay Thursday 12:10 AM Pretty decent think I did pretty good on my midterm. Wbu? Thursday 8:31 AM Hey! sorry I fell asleep last night haha, do you have a snapchat? Thursday 10:06 AM Indeed, its Friday 11:24 PM I unadded you because I know you're a cat fish and that isn't okay. Honestly you can't be doing that to girls Like you sent me a pic in a Chrysler in a Subaru in a matter of 15 min like I'm not an idiot Friday 11:52 PM I work at hertz washing rental
  • 18

    Just say you’re the most boring man in the world and go

    tinder fail - Clothing - 23 Student 10 miles away Look at the second picture, it's got a story. I was with a friend in Trier and he approached a blonde girl. She likes him so we join her for shopping. At New Yorker I got bored in the women's section so I put that orange thing on and told friend to take some damn pics. This is the kind of shit you'll have to 1 23 deal with. Student
  • 19

    The perfect response

    tinder fail - Text - 64%7:31 PM Lindsey Today 9:57 AM Thave a crazy weird birthmark Today 11:21 AM Wild What does it resemble? Today 3:08 PM Lol a quarter Makes cents Sent Type a message... GIF
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  • 20

    "Joe is going places...but only in that hospital"

    tinder fail - Furniture - B0 64% 19:28 КВ/s Joe, 27 Patient at HOSPITAL less than a mile away Sup ladies, I'm joe, I just got crushed by 3000 pounds. Got a broken pelvis but still dtf. I do have a catheter. I don't wanna be "one of those guys" who lies about his catheter status. The catheter may be an issue but great minds do great things. Bedbound, you literally have to all the work I probably can't get off.. Or get hard. But hey; great minds. Anyway here at UVA medical center if you wanna smas

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