Woman Fuming When Hired Surrogate Tries To Replace Her In Her Marriage

Author image for Mayarey
Mayarey
Dec 23, 2021 7:00 PM EST

Surrogacy is a relatively new practice. It's unbelievable how many ways there are to make children these days. But many of them are highly expensive and require a lot of legal discussion. It can seem overwhelming but these processes are crucial. Lawyers are there to ensure that people are aware of their roles in these situations. However, nobody can force you to sign a contract, and if your surrogate mother changes her mind throughout the process... It can get quite messy.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    Organism - r/AmltheAsshole u/ThrowawayAlt345 · 3h 2 7 e1 S 2 2 A1 9 AITA for telling my surrogate to stop acting like she was my husband's wife?
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345

    It was Reddit user u/ThrowawayAlt345 who asked the 'Am I The A-Hole' community if they were in the wrong for confronting her surrogate about how she was acting like her husbands wife. Messy, messy, messy.

  • 02
    Font - My husband and I have been together for 5 years. We wanted kids but because of my health problems this wasn't possible. We decided to go with surrogacy, my friend nominated her sister ( Brittany 29) I agreed right away cause I know Brittany and the family. We've set everything up. Discussed payment, short and long term plans, counseling and dr appointments. We explored IVF and chose a private clininc to get it done.
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345

    Before diving into the story, she provides some much-needed detail on her marriage and how she and her husband came to the decision to hire a surrogate. It clearly wasn't a choice they made on a whim.

  • 03
    Font - It started after Brittany took a pregnancy test. She only told my husband though she had both our numbers. she only sent my husband a pic of the test while he was at work and sent me nothing when I gave her my personal contact info but it was okay. Things got complicated when Brittany started having access to our credit cards for her own wants and claim they were the baby's needs.
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 04
    Font - She excluded me from dr visits and scans and had only my husband go with her. Her excuse was my husband drives and has time since I work and "unavailable" most of the time. I felt isolated from this experience but said nothing knowing she's bearing a lot of burden so I had patience. My husband had no idea what was going on and if this was normal. This was new to us so we didn't know.
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 05
    Font - She's 7 months in and last week she had us visit to discuss things that I thought we'd previously agreed on but she said she changed her mind about and her mom was there too. I heard Brittany out and was shocked when she gave a list of how things should be from now on since she said "there was lot of confusion" in the past cause of me stressing her out by complaining. She requested she gets say in things like baby name after I "deleted" the list of names she sent to my husband. She wanted
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 06
    Font - Her mom went off and and said her daughter was being mistreated when she put herself mentally and physically through the most selfless act for us, to make us a family. She gave up a part of her life in those months to give us what we want and I was acting selfish and ungrateful. She had us leave then told my friend and it got more complicated. I was told to apologize for what i said. IATA
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 07
    Font - Edit: yes, we agreed on paying for the surrogacy like I stated above. So no favors or anything. Edit: No, we did not have a legal contract because my friend said there was no need for us to do that and basically talked us out of it since we are considered family but we had an agreement including paying her. Edit: Question about whether Brittany had kids of her own. She was a single mom of a 4 year old who passed away from an accident. She had him at young age but she always seemed in good
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 08
    Font - Widgetsinparadise · 3h This is why surrogacy is so heavily regulated. Was there a contract? If not, yikes, get a lawyer ASAP. Surrogates have no business being involved in naming the baby or dictating time spent with the child. Red flags abound. You're NTA but you may have put yourself in a situation where an unstable person could now have leverage to essentially be a 3rd parent to your child. G Reply t 5.4k 3 ...
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 09
    Font - HouseRenovations · 3h Partassipant [3] 2 Awards YTA 100% for not having a contract and I find it hard to believe that your clinic did not insist on one before proceeding. Honestly, I think this sounds made up to me, since it is unheard of not to have a surrogacy contract in place before anything medical happens at a clinic because without one situations like that happen too often. G Reply 1 4k 3 ...
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 10
    Font - cassie_chou · 3h Asshole Enthusiast [8] I dont want to sound horrible but I would check if your husband is having an affair with her. If not physical then at least emotional. My husband would tell me if someone who "involded" with both of us, was messaging him only. Also, it doesn't even look like he's defending you. It's crazy that he said nothing whilst she made her demands and when her mom was tearing you a new one. Strange. Strange. Strange. 6 Reply 4 1.3k 3 ...
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 11
    Font - Disneyfreak77· 3h Partassipant [4] NTA She wants the "doting husband" treatment while she's pregnant. Lawyer up and lay down the law for her. She's carrying your baby, you get to name it. As for your husbands credit cards and time, she's out of her mind. Also, isn't it usually a requirement for a surrogate that she's already carried a healthy pregnancy to term? Does she not have other kids? This is what's wrong with 1) having a family friend do it. Too personal And 2) not checking their m
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 12
    Font - Full_Fold_8732 · 3h Partassipant [2] This is delicate... NTA IF you have a legal contract that has been notarized. If you didn't do that then I'm sorry but you and your husband are idiots. Also, never do business (and yes this is business) with friends. 6 Reply 1 488 3
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345
  • 13
    Font - LoganDeLuca2004 · 3h Pooperintendant [67] NTA. Lawyer up, it sounds like she's planning on keeping the baby for herself. 6 Reply 1 346 ...
    via u/ThrowawayAlt345

    Like what you see? Find some hilarious women's memes on our Instagram @Cheezcake_Humor

Tags

crazy aita marriage baby contract surrogate birth Reddit
Scroll Down For The Next Article