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The Cops Of Reddit Are Confessing to the Stupidest Calls They've Ever Responded To

Policing, it's a dirty job, but someone's got to do it. 

But with all the stupid people out there, have you ever wondered why they aren't getting called for dumb shit all the time? Well, it turns out, they are! 

The police officers of Reddit are sharing the stupidest calls they've ever responded to, and, man, they are as advertised. 

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  • 1

    People are not very smart.

    Text - - rockyburnett5 7784 points 17 hours ago A stolen TV remote Fyi, it wasn't stolen just fell between the couch cushions permalink embed
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  • 2
    Text - l IanRG 10.3k points 15 hours ago Domestic dispute call We got there and the mother of a teenage boy, maybe fourteen, is loud and upset. Her problem was described as, "He's interested in GIRLS!" Oddly enough, it happens around that age. Not a thing I could do about that one. permalink embed
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  • 3
    Text - -] Chalie00 2730 points 11 hours ago Not a cop but I used to be in a band with one. The funniest story he would tell us is that he and his partner were sitting on their bikes the corner (they were motorcycle cops) doing paperwork. All of a sudden a truck pulls up to them at the stoplight, rolls down the window and says "what?" They look at him, shrug and say "what?" He says back to the "what" louder this time and they smell alcohol on his breath. The guy totally got himself busted. Got ha
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  • 4
    Text - [-] vpastabender 7302 points 12 hours ago Retired police officer here. I once got sent to a "domestic" (a fight between people living together). When I arrived, a man is standing on the sidewalk in front of a two story house, alone, calm, and sober. Alone, calm, and sober is as rare as a unicorn when domestics are involved. From the upstairs window, I can hear a very pissed off, drunk woman calling us both every name in the book. He tells me that they just broke up yesterday and he came o
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  • 5
    Text - [cknight18 7515 points 15 hours ago Medical emergency, kid had gotten his finger stuck in a wiffle ball. Another medical emergency, woman had taken 3 ibuprofen and wasn't sure what would happen permalink embed
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  • 6
    Text - [] skibbytoast 3200 points 12 hours ago When my brother was little, he called 911 and hung up. Police show up, he tells us he called because he wanted to talk to our mom. Our mom was an EMT permalink embed
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  • 7
    Text - ] Igoe_yougo 4040 points 11 hours ago My uncle was a dispatcher in a suburb of Minneapolis/St. Paul, and would tell me stories whenever I saw him. My favorite goes like this: Uncle: 911, what's your emergency? Caller: Yes, I'd like to report two suspicious vehicles passing something back and forth in Potawatomi park. Uncle: Ok, we'll send an officer out to assess. Uncle: Dispatch to car 45, two suspicious vehicles in Potawatomi park, passing items back and forth Car 45: Uhhh...car 45 to d
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  • 8
    Text - [-1 LaserSailor760 9430 points 14 hours ago Was base police for a large naval station, a lady called 911 because there was a spider in her garage We went out to tell her not to abuse 911, and she replied "Well do you have anything more important to do?" My partner and I just signed, and ended up relocating said spider outside.
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  • 9
    Text - [-r_kay 16.0k points 16 hours ago Tecnically i didn't respond, but: 911 hangup. Upon recall a small child answered and advised there was a spider in his house. Officer that responded advised over the radio "the intruder has been neutralized." I lost it
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