Tech Support Employee Expects Speakerless Computer To Make Noise

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    Font - 1 1 31 The New Guy Chronicles - Episode 9: The Sound of an Empty Head Medium These are the stories of the New Guy. All of what you are about to read is true. I write you these tales of mirth and woe, of entertainment and anger with as much accuracy and as little embellishment as I can manage. Many conversations are written as best I can remember them from my notes and memories about the incidents they describe, but the heart of what you are about to read is as true as I can make it. Names
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    Font - Jordan - FNG Thomas - Me, the manager and network admin John - The older of my two other reports, primarily responsible for server maintenance, major application upgrades, and supporting our smaller off-site locations and their specific applications Daniel - The younger of my two original employees, though here for the same amount of time as John. Both longer than me, actually. Desktop and server support, document management and phone system support, phenomenal people skills.
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    Font - What is happiness? No such thing exists in this forsaken place. All is barren wasteland, void of hope and meaning. Woe. Woe upon all you who dare tread here. Heed my warnings and flee from this place of desolation. All is- Alas, I suppose you are here for another tale of Jordan the empty-headed and not my pleas for this company to be bathed in the cleansing fires of ruin and destruction. Well, let us take a voyage back in time to... DAY 99 - The Sound of an Empty Head A ticket comes in fo
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    Font - User: "Yeah, we can't hear sound when we play videos." Me: looking at the desk "Ah, no speakers. That explains that. We'll go grab you a set." We leave the office to head back to ours. Jordan: "So what's the problem?" Me: "What do you mean?" Jordan: "Well, do you think it's an internal problem or something?" Me: "What? No."
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    Font - Jordan: "Then what's the problem?" Me: visible confusion "Do you not know what the problem is?" Jordan: "Well they said the speakers weren't working, but you said there were no speakers." Me: visible confusion intensifies "OK..." Jordan: "Isn't there an internal speaker?" Ме: "No." we enter our office Jordan: "So what's the problem with it?"
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    Font - Bewildered. Confused. Mystified. I could empty a thesaurus into this story and not have the words to adequately describe the feeling of my brain doing a hard reset in that moment. Jordan has lied, he's misunderstood, he's failed to follow instructions, wasted countless hours, driven users from his presence with his awkwardness, and otherwise proved himself incapable of faithfully discharging his duties. But this? This is a new low. This is an unprecedented, heretofore never seen level of
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    Font - I turn from him, averting my eyes from the dull look upon his face. Silently weeping with the knowledge that humanity could produce a 20-year-old ostensibly normal adult incapable of understanding "computer with no noise-maker no make noise" I slunk back to my office. He managed to install the speakers. The speakers managed to produce sounds. I do not know if he managed to understand the connection. 1k Q 171 ↑, Share

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