'Smelling bad is genuinely the worst insult someone can receive': Guy tells smelly coworker he can't drive him to work anymore

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  • 01
    Font - AITA for refusing to carpool with my coworker Me (22M) and my coworker Jack(23M) live relatively close to one another (about 2 blocks apart from one another) and we work the same hours and his house is directly on commute so when we realized this it was a no brainer for us to carpool. Jack used to take public transit and I used to be stuck in traffic on the QEW (local highway that's notoriously slow) so being able to take the HOV and cruise into work cut my commute time in half, it was a
  • 02
    Font - The problem, Jack smells awful. Like not just like a little BO after a workout, but like f rank rotting onions. At work its tolerable but sitting in a car for almost 40 minutes a day is just unbearable, and the smell lingers for long after he's gone so my car just permanently smells abysmal. So after about 2 weeks of commuting together I had enough.
  • 03
    Font - I decided that I should probably just be honest with him about the reason, and told him that the body odor was becoming unpleasant for me and that I didn't want to carpool anymore. He got really upset, telling me that it was unfair for me to just decided out of the blue to double his commute time and make him pay for public transit. When I talked to my girlfriend she said I should've at least asked him to shower or something before just refusing to drive together, but previous complaints
  • 04
    Font - D schoobydoo42 · 10 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [25] NTA. This is a tough situation but I think you honestly might have done this guy a favor in the long run by being honest. He's gotta know that his hygiene is going to cause major problems in life. Better to learn the lesson like this than something way higher stakes. 3.8k Reply Share
  • 05
    Font - B derpne13 8 hr. ago I wanted to jump on the top comment only because I think this guy has a disease I read about in school: bromhidrosis. OP, if you read this, I think your coworker could control the disease a small amount. Avoiding booze, smokes, and foods like asparagus and fish helps a lot. He can also get different medicated washes. There are two types. One exists in the arm pits and groin, the stinky areas. The other is a bit more body-wide and involves more proteins on his skin. I
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    Font - _Drumheller_. 10 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [21] ΝΤΑ If several people already told him his hygiene sucks and he still isn't willing to change anything then this is fully on him. T808 Reply Share
  • 07
    Font - Limerase 7 hr. ago It's got nothing to do with hygiene. OP has commented that it is a medical issue. 115 Reply Share
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    Font - Fatigue-Error 10 hr. ago NTA The only compromise you could have made would have been to give him a little bit of notice so he can adjust his plans. But, smells are just such a big deal, I don't know if it would have been fair to you. If you can't stand the smell, you don't have to carpool. you never have to carpool with anyone. 250 Reply Share
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    Font - Popular-Way-7152. 3 hr. ago I don't think notice is necessary. He used to take public transportation. Assuming it still runs on the same schedule, he can jump on it tomorrow.
  • 10
    Font - bananaspilled 2 hr. ago Notice would be kinda weird too like ?? Imagine sitting awkwardly in the car together while op serves his 5 day notice period like?? Lmao
  • 11
    Font - HedgieTwiggles 10 hr. ago NTA, but I knew someone like that. I felt bad for them. They had an extreme sensitivity to most antiperspirants. They showered daily, so it wasn't a hygiene issue. Turns out they could use the "clinical strength" antiperspirants sold in stores. I've also read articles of some people whose biochemistry just causes them to smell very poorly.
  • 12
    Font - This person might have a physiological issue going on. But if you're driving on the QEW, I would hope he has access to healthcare and hopefully prescriptions that can help with what's going on. He's just got to do something to address the situation. Again, I feel poorly for this guy, but you can't make yourself sick and ruin your vehicle. 193 Reply Share
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    Font - TheLittleStinkster OP. 10 hr. ago Yeah, as far as I can tell it is a medical issue which is why I feel particularly bad. Also unfortunate fact about Canadian healthcare, even though it is mostly public lots of things aren't covered, including dental, optometry and most egregiously prescriptions. 179 Reply Share
  • 14
    Font - RiverSong 777 10 hr. ago [55] Pooperintendant NTA and maybe that'll help him understand that stinking up shared spaces won't go unpunished his whole life. While it may not be a fireable offence it's certainly reason enough for people to spend as little time as possible in his vicinity.
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    Font - a Contented Recluse. 10 hr. ago NTA You had an arrangement and it wasn't working for you so you ended it. You didn't sign a contract in blood to carpool forever more. He should be grateful to have had a break from public transit for two weeks.
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    Font - Cornelious72 10 hr. ago ΝΤΑ Smelling bad is genuinely the worst insult someone can receive imo, how has he not changed?
  • 17
    Font - latents 9 hr. ago telling me that it was unfair for me to just decided out of the blue to double his commute time and make him pay for public transit His commute time is based on how far he chooses live from work. His public transport costs are based on what the local transit authority charges, as he didn't choose to provide himself with an alternative way to get to work.
  • 18
    Font - Neither situation is caused by you nor your fault. The appropriate response would have been to thank you for the time and money you saved him while you carpooled. If he wants to carpool, why doesn't he provide a car? You could drive to his place and park, and then use his car to ride in together. That way he only damages his own vehicle.
  • 19
    Font - The LittleStinkster OP. 9 hr. ago His commute time is based on how far he chooses to live from work. His public transport costs are based on what the local transit authority charges, as he didn't choose to provide himself with an alternative way to get to work. Neither situation is caused by you nor your fault. The appropriate response would have been to thank you I'm pretty sure he doesn't have a license, hence why he takes public transit.
  • 20
    Font - Motor Business483 4 hr. ago Pooperintendant [61] Ht was only cheaper because he was an AH and did not pay you his fair share of the carpool costs: Gas, depreciation, wear & tear, ...
  • 21
    Font - unaliveplant 10 hr. ago NTA imo There was a guy at school who smelled bad and he knew as countless people told him and a girl I used to sit next to in English she knew but she showered daily and stuff and it didn't change anything, she constantly sprayed deodorant and it made O difference. I don't think it's always about not showering I think sometimes it's also what environment they live in and if he's depressed who knows what environment he lives in.
  • 22
    Font - My best friend used to smell bad ALLL the time even if he showered and washed his clothes he would still smell because his place was full of rubbish literally and no matter how many times we told him it took my ex moving in and him getting a gf before he cleaned up his place, for real. Sometimes you got to acknowledge at least that they could be in a bad place right now and can't seem to sort this.
  • 23
    Font - FreedomNew8405 10 hr. ago NTA. You done him a favour by telling him about his BO. Probably the best case of cruel to be kind. Not easy to hear but for his and everyone's benefit really. Also, he was using public transport before, it's not as if this was his first and only method to commuting to work. He was getting a great bargain by chilling as a passenger, assume free ride into the office in less time and more favourable conditions than a bus. You on the other hand making all the effort
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    Font - Used_Mark_7911. 10 hr. ago Certified Proctologist [20] Strictly speaking NTA I guess because nobody is obligated to drive the guy to work. I do think maybe you were short-sighted though. If instead of cutting him off altogether you had made your willingness to commute with him contingent on him doing something about his body odor then everybody would have won (you, him, and your co-workers). It sounds like you don't know much about what is causing his issues (you mentioned a medical condi

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