'I have no interest [in] this baby': Guy makes up 'work emergency' lie to get out of a baby shower

Author image for Remy Millisky
Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
May 15, 2023 5:00 PM EDT

At least this guy was honest, right? In a post to r/AmItheA**hole that I'm sure the OP regrets by now, this dude asked if he was wrong for the way he avoided going to a party. 

As u/Waste_Studio_2716 shared, he and his fiancée have been dating for two years, and he believes their relationship is going great. He doesn't know her family too well, since the OP and his fiancée are a five hour drive away from them. That could have changed when the couple was invited to a baby shower for the fiancée's cousin and her baby. But, as the OP wrote, "Of course I was invited too, I wasn't thrilled at all." 

It's understandable that the OP might not want to drive for hours and hours to spend time with some random cousin. But he'd be spending valuable time with his fiancée's family. In the comments, there was no love at all for this OP. After all, he did lie to his partner. He added an edit saying that he did apologize to his fiancée. 

Next, this social media manager got some delicious revenge on a cranky client who wanted his tweets posted now. 

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  • 01
    Facial expression - 'I told my fiancé that I had a work emergency and I needed to make a small trip, she didn't ask many questions'
    via Jason Leung on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - r/AmItheA A: Posted by u/Waste_Studio_2716 AITA for faking a work emergency to skip a party with my fiancé? My fiancé (f27) and I (m30) have been dating for two years, we got engaged in new years eve. Our relationship is very good, really we don't have problems at all, we're thinking on getting married and are looking forward to marriage.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 03
    Font - Well, her family lives away in another state, about five hours of distance. I don't have a problem with them, they're fine. Because of the distance we have only been able to met a couple times.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 04
    Font - Well, about two months ago fiancé received a invitation to a baby shower for her cousin. She told me she was very excited because her and her cousin are close and it's her first baby. Of course I was invited too, I wasn't thrilled at all. I have only met this cousin a couple times, I have no interest on this baby.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 05
    Font - Originally I said yes but then the week of the baby shower came and I wasn't feeling driving five hours to go at all. So I told my fiancé that I had a work emergency and I needed to make a small trip, she didn't asked many questions so I wss lucky for that. This was my friend's (m29) idea.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 06
    Font - I told her that I will try to come back to go to the baby shower with her. And then my friend and I left. Then I called her and told her I won't be able to make it. So she went on her own, then I came back and everything was fine.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 07
    Font - She never found out the truth until last week, my friend and his wife came over to our house to have dinner. Then his wife fed up and accidentally spoiled the truth. My fiancé then got angry at me because I lied. After they left she asked me why didn't I just told her I didn't want to go to the baby shower with her, I told her I didn't want to hurt her feelings. We argued and now she's being distant.
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 08
    Font - Edit: I spoke to my fiancé as some people suggested, I asked her to forgive me and told her about my parents. She knew very little about this, only that they used to fight all the time and they stayed together because of me, I told her about their fights and honestly I was embarrassed but she was supportive. I told her I'll search for a therapist today, she told me she'll help me, she told me she's hurt, but she'll give me a chance to regain her trust if she can see I'm trying. I think th
    via u/Waste_Studio_2716
  • 09

    Commenters did not hold back while discussing the OP's sitatuation.

    Font - Huge_Researcher7679. A e Enthusiast [6] YTA times a thousand. 1. Lying instead of being honest that you just didn't want to go and covering it up by saying you "didn't want to hurt her feelings".
    via u/Huge_Researcher7679
  • 10
    Font - 2. Saying "I have no interest in this baby" after your fiancé has expressed how excited she is. Who cares if you personally don't have interest? She does, and her family was excited to have you there. 3. Her finding out from your friends wife so she was the only person not in the loop.
    via u/Huge_Researcher7679
  • 11
    Font - Do you actually like and respect your fiancé? Because lying to get out of spending what seems to be limited time with her family is so disrespectful and gross.
    via u/Huge_Researcher7679
  • 12
    Font - steeke82 To add a few reasons why op is the asshole to the original list: 4. Missing an opportunity to get to know her family better. By your own words, you don't get to see them that much, but if you guys are talking about a wedding, it's time to be more involved and interested!
    via u/steeke82
  • 13
    Font - 5. Missing an opportunity for a fun road trip with your fiancée, with plenty of time to talk about weddings, family etc. 6. Letting your fiancée drive for 10 hours all by herself. This must have been a very very lonely and long drive for her. Not to mention a safety hasard.
    via u/steeke82
  • 14
    Font - BlakeSwag Adding that he pulled this last minute too, making it so she was waiting around to start her drive and stripping her of the opportunity of taking a friend maybe or making other travel arrangements. This is the part that gets me most. Even a weeks advance would have been better than day of.
    via u/BlakeSwag
  • 15
    Font - Escapetheshape. Our relationship is very good, really we don't have problems at all I'd say the lying (and not even a small white lie), is kind of a problem.
    via u/Escapetheshape
  • 16
    Rectangle - Pillsy74 Partas ipant [1] YTA. If you can't be honest with her now, how can she trust you to be when you're married?
    via u/Pillsy74
  • 17
    Rectangle - williowgsc_16 YTA. If you lie about the small things. You will lie about the big things.
    via u/williowgsc_16
  • 18
    Font - lovingchipseater Double YTA, since not only did you skip such an important moment for your fiancée, but also because you lied to her (and seemingly you have no remorse for that). Also, this friend of yours doesn't seem like a real friend.
    via u/lovingchipseater
  • 19
    Font - Rich-398 A Enthusiast [5] YTA - You don't lie in a relationship. You can express your opinion. You don't have to be interested in the baby and you don't have to go to the shower but be straight about it. You need to decide whether or not your fiance is worth some inconvenience. If not, then I would ask why you think she is the one for you. BTW- his wife didn't f up. You did.
    via u/Rich-398
  • 20
    Font - alienabductionfan Parta ant [2] This was such an involved lie. Beyond the moral dilemma (YTA btw) I have to wonder if it wouldn't have been easier just to go to the shower in the first place? You didn't need to go to so much effort to lie to her about something so small. Do you have issues with confrontation? Are you an avoidant person in general? If you care about her enough to protect her feelings you should care about her enough not to lie to her.
    via u/alienabductionfan
  • 21
    Font - shadow-foxe Commander in Cheeks [26... YTA- no YOU messed up, not the friends wife. YOU hurt her way more by lying, saying you dont want to attend a baby shower is FINE, pretending to have a work emergency is just childish.
    via u/shadow-foxe
  • 22
    Font - daydreamingtulip. I'd also bet that the friends wife didn't mess up and instead deliberately shared so that OPs wife was aware of the lies going on
    via u/daydreamingtulip
  • 23
    Font - slap-a-frap YTA - how can you not see this. You lied to get out of something that was really important to your fiance. Being in a relationship isn't just about you. It's a partnership. You lied and got caught. Please tell us all how YOU think that she can ever trust you again. You made this bed, and now you get to lie in it.
    via u/slap--frap
  • 24
    Font - Apprehensive-Owl4635. Colo-rectal Surgeon [30] YTA Bro, no one really likes baby showers. It's about celebrating a life event of a family member. This was important to your finance. Doing things you aren't stoked about but matter to your partner is part of being in a relationship. You sound immature and selfish.
    via u/Apprehensive-Owl4635

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aita emergency friends lying family baby shower fiancé
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