'[They] would listen to one song on loop the whole day': 25+ Employees share their coworker's most annoying habits

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  • 01
    Product - That annoying coworker - what does he/she keep doing? MrsSwimmer Calls people on speakerphone so we can all hear it! We work in cubicle rows. EVERY DAY!
  • 02
    Font - That annoying coworker - what does he/she keep doing?
  • 03
    Font - Cweid Prints. Every. Fing. Thing. All day long. From the moment he gets here until the moment he leaves. Receives an email? Print it. Sends an email? Prints it. Googles something? PRINTS THE RESULTS PAGE.
  • 04
    Rectangle - Wipwip Close talker with coffee breath, who doesnt let you leave the conversation... Dayam!!!
  • 05
    Font - wrmerman Doesn't have a car, 11:55 rolls around "Hey, you guys heading out for lunch? Mind if I hitch a ride?" That alone isn't so bad, but then there are the days when he says "just grab me something, all I have is a card"....
  • 06
    Font - Then there are the days when I bring my lunch. "oh, you brought your own lunch today? That's cool I guess..." (Mopes away) then once he bothers everyone with a car, to no avail.... "Hey are those chips? Mind if I have some, I didn't get to have any lunch" YOU'RE A FU ING ADULT, JON!
  • 07
    Font - [deleted] My wife has an annoying co-worker that uses that fake spray tan stuff. We're not sure if it's a nervous tick or what, but she likes to rub the side of her face against door jambs and corners if she is leaning against it while talking to you. Their office is full of orange patches about 5 1/2 feet up from the ground.
  • 08
    Font - Jazzremix Finishes words while you're talking like a rapper's hype-man. "So, last night I went to the grocery store (store). When I was in the line to check out (out), the guy in front of me was paying with a check (check). It took this guy 10 minutes to write it out (out)"
  • 09
    Font - fannymcslap He has an amazing quality. He will come to me for help, and ask me a question. Whilst answering the question he will mirror what I'm saying. By the end of the conversation he will repeat the solution back to me and ask me: "Right, have you got that now?" I've never seen anything like it.
  • 10
    Font - Neeerdlinger He doesn't get my social cues of when I want to end a conversation. I've started to get pretty blatant now, turning my back and starting to type an email, etc. but it doesn't seem to get it. One time I started walking down the corridor to the kitchen to end the conversation and he decided to get up and follow me down, continuing to talk all the way!
  • 11
    Font - straydog1980 Used to have a colleague that would listen to one song on loop the whole day every day. The song changed once in a while. For a week it was Jason Mraz
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    Font - [deleted] Sips (slurps) coffee and goes Ahhhhh loudly. Every. Freakin. Time. Forgot to mention, the travel mug he drinks from has some sort of pressure valve that squeals every time he takes a drink.
  • 13
    Font - slnkycrmr_datnose Keeps referring to me as Morpheus and doing judo ninja matrix moves in my face every time we pass each other.
  • 14
    Font - MrsSwimmer Calls people on speakerphone so we can all hear it! We work in cubicle rows. EVERY DAY!
  • 15
    Font - [deleted] Leg tapping.....it's fting infuriating. We have connected table/spacers, and I've even separated the desks but I'm still constantly vibrating. He's brought down books, name tobelerones, nothing is safe. I can't even have a glass of water on my desk without feeling like I'm in Jurassic f ing Park.
  • 16
    Rectangle - C tyMcGiggles "Halfway there! it's humpday!" Every. Single. F ing. Wednesday.
  • 17
    Font - headsortailz First my boss will email me a task. Then he'll call me on the way into the office about the same task. Then he'll stop in my office when gets there about the same task! EVERY. da D DAY.
  • 18
    Font - hereuntilnow He says "currently right now". Never just "currently" or "right now" or even "at this time", but "currently right now".
  • 19
    Font - I used to work at an office where anything that happened would become gossip fodder instantly. Since I didn't know the snitch was, I would feed different people with various versions of the same story. So when I was asked if I was dating someone, I would try and make it sound that I was confiding them sensitive info. Then I would wait until one of those rumors prevailed, turns out it was the cleaner. Then I became her best friend and kept feeding her with false intel. I hated her.
  • 20
    Smile - t5runner Say "oooh yeah killin it" every twelve seconds
  • 21
    Font - ✪ [deleted] Constantly wanting to switch shifts, and take off holidays using her kids as an excuse. I get it you want to be there for your kids, but I have a life and a family as well.
  • 22
    Rectangle - XVermillion Being late all the fing time; I just worked 3rd shift, I'm tired and hungry, I'd like to go home now.
  • 23
    Font - bantones He yells "SUPPLIES!!" and then jumps out of the supplies closet.
  • 24
    Font - [deleted] Mr. SqueakyShoes is about 70. He looks kinda like Santa Claus if Kris Kringle was 5 feet tall. Mr. SqueakyShoes falls asleep at his desk. I mean, he legit snores at his desk. Mr. SqueakyShoes also has carpel tunnel. He was out of work for a month getting his hand operated on for it. Apparently, it didn't work, because I still listen to him every day saying "Click It" to his voice-command program. There was one Friday that I swore if I heard "Click It" one more time I'd bust down
  • 25
    Font - Mr. SqueakyShoes takes his lunch at 10:15 AM. Look, I've been there. You're bored and you're hungry and sometimes the lunch bag starts looking really fing appealing mid-morning in a cubicle. But the last thing I need to smell at this hour is fish, which Mrs. SqueakyShoes packs for Mr. SqueakyShoes way too often. One time Mr. SqueakyShoes spilled his nautical soup and it crept under my cubicle. On those weird days in between seasons when the HVAC system has bipolar disorder and gets way to
  • 26
    Font - Mr. SqueakyShoes is a that software developer has no idea how to use a computer. It took me ten minutes to explain to him how to change margins on a Word doc. This is exacerbated by the fact that he CAN'T USE A MOUSE AND HAS TO NAVIGATE BY VOICE. In the end, Mr. SqueakyShows isn't a bad guy. It's just that we're all trapped in this pressure cooker baking under these fluorescent lights and after a while, some things are just too much. Also, his shoes squeak.
  • 27
    Font - bluerazz_ I sit next to a woman who is not content unless she is complaining. Truly, those who do not sit near her do not believe me, but it is true. She is a newly appointed office assistant to a VP and thinks that she should be included in every meeting, every trip and every idea that the VP has. For the past four weeks, she has been loudly complaining about not having a color printer and having to walk down to the big color printer just like everyone else.
  • 28
    Font - Did I mention she curses all the time, yells at the phone when people "talk back to her" and asks if they know who she is? Oh yes, and when people are having a conversation with me, she listens in and chimes in whenever she d well pleases. She is the worst human being I have ever sat next to at work.
  • 29
    Font - [deleted] She steals my pens. I KNOW YOU LIKE THE BLUE PENS LINDA, STOP DENYING IT!
  • 30
    Font - Misterfork The bh just keeps eating crackers like she owns the place.
  • 31
    Font - [deleted] A guy at my office sits in the communal dining area and says "There he/she is! Hahaha!" to literally everyone who walks in. If you try to ignore him by looking at your phone he says "Communicating with the aliens again are we? Hahaha!". Foff bro I'm just tryna get a coffee.
  • 32
    Font - tmishkoor She has problems in her life, and she tells me about them every morning at 7am. At 8am, another employee joins us, she tells him too. at 9am, another employee joins us, she tells him too. at 10am another employee joins us, she tells him too. at noon, another employee joins us, she tells him too. Then at night, she will want to come over and hang out, and she tells all of my roommates her S.
  • 33
    Font - I'm sorry you have problems, but I hear you tell everybody about it and it annoys me. EDIT: since a lot of people are asking, I am cool with this girl, and we sometimes hang out. She annoys me, but as long as I make sure that we don't run into anybody that she hasn't told her story to, she's fun.
  • 34
    Font - senatorskeletor The perfect mixture of being an idiot, and being condescending about it. The kid is the most junior person in our group, so I'm willing to excuse his constant breaches of office protocol. There's a lot of stuff you just won't know until you've been in a high-pressure office for a few years. But if you think you're too good for your assignments, then don't just glare at people who give them to you-- stop fing up the assignments.
  • 35
    Font - My favorite example is one Friday before a holiday, when he emailed to say that he hadn't been able to fall asleep the night before until an hour or so before. He was planning to take the afternoon off anyway, he said, so he was just going to stay home. Here's why that was stupid: 1. He put in the reason for being out, and it was a S ty one. Again, this is a high- pressure office; everyone works through being tired, and pretty often. Either make up a good reason or keep it vague.
  • 36
    Font - 2. If you were planning to take a half-day anyway, that's more reason to suck it up and come in, not less. Sleep in the afternoon. 3. He didn't make a hint of a suggestion about getting his work done. That's all anyone cares about, at least here. If you can put in a sentence or two making it clear that you're still on top of things ("I'|| be checking my email and responding throughout the day"), you're fine, even if in practice you're asleep for
  • 37
    Font - hours at a time. 4. He actually did have work due! This was the craziest part. It's one thing, as I said above, to breach office protocol. But if you have a deadline, and something comes up, you have to work with your supervisors to find out how to get it done or get it postponed. You can't just ignore it. And this from the kid who goes around talking about what an expert he is at everything. Pro-tip: if you want to impress your office, start by doing good work.

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