'The whole atmosphere in the room changed': Assistant stuns their oblivious, wealthy coworkers with reality check

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  • 01
    Font - 'My coworkers are usually pretty good to work with... some of the things they say are kind of weird'
  • 02
    Font - AITA for bluntly telling the people I work with that no, not "everyone in the office" can afford to buy a house? Not the A-hole My coworkers are usually pretty good to work with. The average salary for them is around 100k+. I'm their administrative assistant and I make about $32k. Anyway some of the things they say are kind of weird.
  • 03
    Font - For example this one woman was shocked that I'd never had any of my clothes tailored before. I think they just really caught up in their own reality you know? Like in their world everyone is beautiful and skinny and rich with purebred dogs and perfect white teeth.
  • 04
    Font - I was helping organize and someone announced they finally bought their first house. The conversation continued on to them kind of being rude and saying like "I don't get why people think no one can afford to buy a house, it's not hard?" and someone was like "Yeah I can't imagine being in my 30s and still renting, I'd feel like such a failure" and they all agreed.
  • 05
    Font - I don't usually get upset about the s they're talking about but I finally had it and was like "I'm 38 and rent, I don't think I'm a failure" One of them was like "Oh well we weren't talking about you, it's just that all these people always go on and on about how it's impossible to save for a down payment."
  • 06
    Font - I was just like "Yeah, it is pretty hard." It was obvious the whole atmosphere in the room changed so I was like "Anyway" and got up and left to the main office to get back to work. Later on one of the other women in the office came up and was like "Hey I'm sorry about earlier I didn't mean to offend you. It got kind of awkward in there."
  • 07
    Font - I said yeah, it was pretty awkward listening to them talk about how they'd feel like a failure if they were in my shoes. She said that's not what she meant, she actually meant that it felt like I was trying to call attention to the wage gap like it was their fault, and that if I wanted to better myself they could help me figure out how to apply to schools and work my way up just like they did.
  • 08
    Font - I said a kind of half-hearted "thanks." It's been weird in the office since then. I know money is one of those no-no topics but it's not like it's a secret that I only make what I make. AITA? forgot to add; we don't have HR and this really isn't an HR thing
  • 09
    Font - Silver-Thing2724 42 2 Certified Proctologist [26] ΝΤΑ They are in an echo chamber filled with people just as privileged as them. They were called out on it and, instead of taking this embarrassing lesson to heart, they doubled down and are blaming you. Like, they apologized. But instead of acknowledging that they are uniquely privileged and not everyone can get where they are, they offered to "help" you get your life together. That's wholly inappropriate.
  • 10
    Font - Kiss_the_Girl Parta ant [1] It sounds like it was just one of them that spoke rudely. So I wouldn't blame everyone in the office homeowner club, but I agree with this otherwise.
  • 11
    Font - B4pangea Pooperintendant [53] NTA. You called them on their snobbery directly, not rudely, and they were rightly embarrassed. Turning it on you with condescending offers to "better yourself" was an extra helping of poo. Your coworkers are pretty insensitive.
  • 12
    Font - AdOpen1605 OP. 42 5 4 & 2 More The better myself thing kind of stung honestly. I know I don't make a lot of money but I'm really comfortable and happy in my life. Not everyone can be a computer programmer software engineer digital marketing goddess? My Daddy always said the world needs sandwich makers.
  • 13
    Font - stannenb Professor Emeritas [80] NTA. Not at all. And that "better yourself" line is deeply condescending. Money is sometimes described as the last taboo, something we don't really talk about. You, appropriately, broke that taboo, and made them, again appropriately, feel guilty for their attitude, if not the wage gap.
  • 14
    Font - [deleted] She didn't even break the taboo - they did. They foolishly started talking about money, OP showed them they didn't even know what they were talking about. Don't break a taboo if you can't even do it right!
  • 15
    Font - big_brotherx101. it's a bulls taboo too, and I look for every appropriate situation to fu with it. It's a taboo because employers don't want us knowing how much we're being stiffed.
  • 16
    Font - Por inediblepeaches NTA. I used to work for a doctors office that raked in 10,000 in payments on a slow day. I was a lowly clinic assistant, earning 20K a year. My CEO/Doctor was charging 500 an hour for his time. In fact most everyone I worked for was far, far richer than we were and they never had the absence of mind to point out so bluntly that they would feel like a failure. It's crass, it's insensitive, and it's mindless to say something so grating in the work place. If you're going
  • 17
    Font - [deleted] So the one woman followed up their amazing insensitivity with what essentially amounted to, "You could be like us if you just worked harder?" Really doubled down there, didn't she? NTA. Even if that coworker doesn't bother to do any self-reflection, then I hope at least some others will have after hearing you speak up. You weren't wrong for reminding them that less than 10% of all employed individuals make over $100k a year. They're in the minority.
  • 18
    Font - famblud Not that it's a big deal but more than 10% of people in US make over $100K per year (I know it's household but average earners per household is less than 2 and this site says 34.1% of households make over $100K/yr) statista US income link I think it was under 10% a few years ago but not anymore. I found it kind of surprising.
  • 19
    Font - on SaltyDoggoMeo NTA. Btw, you're horribly underpaid. You barely make over $15/hr. That's not fair for a hard- working administrative assistant. Write down everything you do, especially over-and- above your job title, how many people you work for, plus the average pay rate for an admin with your experience (you can get it in salary.com), then request an immediate pay raise of $5/hr. Email it to your boss (for a paper trail).
  • 20
    Font - I did this at an "entry- level" job after busting my a for 2+ years for s pay. They also didn't S have an HR dept. I got a fat raise. No employer will voluntarily pay you more unless you ask. You can do it!!! 484 Share
  • 21
    Font - pray4mojo2020 I mean it's one banana, OP, what could it cost? $10? These people are as out of touch as Lucille Bluth, and somehow more condescending. ΝΤΑ.
  • 22
    Font - I once had a boss show me what he bought during a trip to the mall at lunch. In his bag were two pair of jeans, a t-shirt and a beanie cap. I picked up the receipt, which fell out of the bag, and said to him "do you realize you spent more on these clothes than you pay me every two weeks" He was like "no s". I said "yeah, no s My checks were $400 higher from then on.
  • 23
    Font - bamf1701 Supreme Court Just-as [... NTA. Your co-workers were being snotty and elitist. I certainly can't blame you for getting angry.
  • 24
    Font - FinancialTennis6 Certified Proctologist [20] NTA. It was a rude thing for them to say and they should feel awkward and embarrassed.

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