'Boss forbids me from emailing/communicating with upper management': Boss tries to control employee's communications, employee uses his own write-up as evidence against her

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    Font - Boss tells me not to e- mail any of her bosses because only she can communicate with them OC Years ago, I was working for a large organization. My boss was very nice and pleasant to work with at first. I was hired and tasked with taking a very troubled department and bringing it up in standards. My boss was fairly supportive during the initial few months on the job but then, something changed. The department began to perform and improve greatly within the first 6 months and this was recog
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    Font - look good and also improved overall morale on the team within the troubled department as they were finally recognized for their efforts and talents, About this time(6 month mark), I was told to watch my back by a few other colleagues (both men and women) outside of my department, because my boss had a reputation for putting her own success over anyone else's. They also warned me that she was known for being very threatened by any successful males who worked with her (male here). She was a
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    Font - ONLY male on the team). After investigating this further, I found there to be some truth to all of this. As it happens, over a 12 year period, over 8 men on her team either quit or were fired (6 fired and 2 quit). Of the women on her team during the same time period, 8 were promoted, 2 quit, 4 were still on her team and 0 were fired. So, I am a bit concerned about this now as 1) I am a male and 2) she has this reputation for making it difficult for men on her team.
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    Font - I just took this all in stride however and focused on continuing to manage the department to greater levels, work on continuing to increase the morale of the department and ensuring I communicate with my boss regularly about any situation that would become problematic for her or me. I also focused on ensuring that she got maximum credit for the improvements of the troubled department and credited her with being a great boss that ensured that the department received the resources and suppo
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    Font - Fast forward to about my 8th month there and I am in a meeting with my boss and she begins to rage against me that I emailed someone who was in the upper management of the company. I explained to her that yes, I did cc that VP because the email in question was one that necessarily involved the entire area under which this particular VP lead. She said I am not to do that and then proceeds to tell me that I am forbidden to email anyone that is above my pay grade as 'that is not my place.' S
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    Font - ONLY SHE is allowed to email these people and that if an email needs to go to them, cc or not, SHE WILL send it. I ask her if she would like me to send the emails that would need to go to VPs to her for her to send and she tells me "Yes, send them to me and then I will send them." I ask her also if she wishes I do not 'call the VPs on the phone as well' and she say "Yes, you are not to call them either". Then she says "I know you may be used to getting your way because you are a man but t
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    Font - About a month goes by and during that time I only need to email a VP once and I write up the email to this VP's department, send it to her and then wait for her to send it on. Now this email is time sensitive and involves giving the VP and his people a head's up about resources needed for a particular project. Now the VP MUST be included in this email because this request involved budgetary issues and only the VP over a specific area is allowed to change or adapt their budget. Otherwise,
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    Font - About a week goes by and I happen to run into this particular VP in the elevator. She asks me about the project, resources etc etc and I let her know that things are good. She then asks about the overrun on this one particular area and I tell her that it is best she ask my boss. She then asks me to send her an email on this particular overrun and I let her know "Sure, I will make that happen." I follow back to my boss, let her know about the conversation with the VP in the elevator and sh
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    Font - that sure, I get it but it would have been r de to not acknowledge this VP's questions since we were stuck in the elevator together and I did not seek out that meeting. She then begins to tell me that she has to write me up for being insubordinate and not honoring her request to not email, call talk to VPs'. I am floored but nothing I can do. As I am leaving her office, she tells me that "I made a mistake in hiring you. I though you were different but you are just as entitled as all the o
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    Font - Do I go to Human Resources and have them play their stupid games with me? Nah, not gonna solve anything especially with a boss that has been at the company for 10 years or so. Human Resources generally cares very little about employees and only really worries about risk and protecting the company. They aren't gonna do for me so I don't report any of this. I seriously thought about filing a complaint about my boss's comments to me. But, when I had S
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    Font - the meeting where I had to sign my write up, I decided against it given the HR officer had to read the write up before I signed it and I figured that since the write up was based on a B policy that my boss created out of thin air, I was right in assuming that HR would do s for me if I had complained anyway. So I just try to get through all this s and start looking for another job on the side.
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    Font - 2 days later I get a call from an SVP (to whom the VP from the elevator reports to). Now my boss also reports to another VP (this VP is a female and also not the same one from the elevator) and this VP to whom my boss reports, also reports to this SVP. This SVP asks me to come to a meeting that next day. I explain that I am happy to do so but I will need to check with my boss first to ensure that there are no conflicts in the schedule. I also state to this SVP that I would appreciate it i
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    Font - So, I email my boss, tell her that the SVP is requesting to meet with me the next day and wanted to make her aware of the meeting. She comes storming into my office around 5:30pm (about an hour before I usually leave) and closes my door and berates me for a good 20 minutes for talking with the SVP. She was so loud that one of the members of the department in which I worked was about to call security just before my boss exited my office. I knew my boss would be mad but didn't expect anythi
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    Font - So, next day, I go to the meeting with the SVP. At that meeting is another 3 VPs: the first is the female VP whom I ran into in the elevator and was asking about overruns; the second is the female VP to whom my boss reports; and the third is a female VP that used to oversee the department in which I presently work. The SVP proceeds to ask me about the overruns. I explain as best as I can about the issues involved and also explain that I had prepared an email a few weeks ago about this.
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    Font - The VP whom I ran into in the elevator states that she never got that email on the cost overruns from me. I then explain that it would not come from me but would have come from my boss. The VP asks why I wouldn't send it. I say that is not my place to send emails to VPs. Then the SVP stops everyone from talking and says "What did you just say?" I then reiterate my response. Then the SVP begins questioning me about this point. After about 15 minutes
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    Font - of my explaining to them that I am not allowed to communicate with them per my boss's orders, they are all pretty disgusted and frustrated. I further explain that this policy was created by my boss and has been consistently enforced by her for the past month or so. They tell me that they will have to come back to me on this but in the meantime, they will get the emails about the overruns from my boss and follow up with her. S S SH!!!
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    Font - So, I go back to my office that day and realize that my head is on the chopping block. I am really in a no win situation and I just have to wait for it to play out. And play out it did.........
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    Font - I come into work the next day (it's a Thursday) and I don't think anything has changed. Seems like a normal oppressive day and I am just waiting for the ax to fall on my head. I work most of the morning and then right before lunch, I get an email. The email is from the SVP with all the VPS copied in on it, that my boss is taking some time off and will be back in a few days. During her absence, all requests and management decisions will be made by the VP to whom my boss reports. I am not q
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    Font - goes by uneventful and the around 4pm, the VP responsible for the department in which I work, comes down and comes into my office and tells me that as of that day, my department and I am no longer reporting to my boss but I was now reporting directly to her. I ask what that means for the department and my job. She said nothing, it just means that the department will be better served under this new reporting structure given the increase in the amount of business that the department was eng
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    Font - told that I was free to now communicate with ANY other VPs or SVPs of the organization as I saw fit. She then apologized for the experience I had with my boss and told me that she was unaware of my boss forbidding me to communicate with her or other VPS or SVPS. I take this all in, not knowing whom is telling the truth but relieved that I will no longer have to endure being treated like a child by my boss. I then ask about my boss and her reporting relationship to my department's other te
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    Font - I stay at this company about 3 years total, have a great working relationship with the VP, whom was now my boss as well as the other VPs and SVP to whom they reported. I only left when I got a better offer in a different industry.
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    Font - My former boss was eventually counseled out (over a 3 month period) after HR investigated her behavior, interviewed me about the arbitrary rules about communicating with VPs that my boss had enforced on me (as well as her shouting at me and writing me up and disparaging me as a male). Talk about karma, her write up of me was used as evidence that she actually had implemented this no contact policy solely with me and because she wrote it up and put it in my employee file, it proved my vera
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    Font - I have never seen her again but if I ever do, I would love to be able to say to her "Great seeing you again. I always tell people that you are the boss that taught me the importance of using email to further my career."
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    Font - TLDR: Boss forbids me from emailing/communicating with upper management in an effort to ensure that she is the only one who gets credit for anything. Boss has a track record of bias against men and exhibits bias against me based on this same bias. This gets found out by upper management and then this leads to exposing my boss's attempt to hide her alleged financial malfeasance. Boss loses her job and I keep mine.
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    Font - snobahr I'm surprised you didn't ask her to email you about the no-contact- above-your-paygrade instructions. 735 Reply Share Analytica0 OP I was treading lightly as I was still pretty new to the company. I actually did send her an email stipulating my understanding of that policy after she and I met about my talking with the VP on the elevator. It helped HR later.
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    Font - AgreeablePie Look, you're making life much harder on yourself. HR is, indeed, there to protect the company- we all know this. But that's useful to you in this case. If you don't document comments like those that she was making early and often, they didn't happen. You want those complaints of yours persevered in company documentation. HR doesn't care about you but don't think they
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    Font - won't get the long knives out when some boss they also don't care about is about to bring huge liability down on the company- which is exactly what happened. Also get ridiculous directives over email and, if your boss refuses, talk to HR about that as well so that they document it and your boss doesn't blame you for not communicating.
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    Font - giantsamalander Blind carbon copy could've saved you initial stress and worry, but foresight is 20/20.
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    Font - Analytica0 OP She would have found out to whomever I BCC something to because the info in the email/email itself would have been forwarded or communicated to her by someone else. She would have taken that as my being sneaky and would have boomeranged back on me. Would have just fed into her perception that I was out to get her job and was trying to be insubordinate, especially after she explicitly told me not to communicate with upper management.
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    Font - Sauce: she told me to never use BCC when sending an email because it meant I was going behind her back and attempting to blind side her management of the department. We were not dealing with a person who was really reasonable or logical in their perceptions of reality.

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