40 Witty Memes for the Bickering, Nagging Old Married Couples (May 2, 2024)

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  • 01
    oh my! @tropicoy Me as a husband STOP POOPING I MISS You
  • 02
    Josh @iwearaonesie friend: What's one thing marriage has taught you? me: If you walk into the house eating a candy bar you better have one for her too 1,196 3:46 PM - Nov 11, 2017 450 people are talking about this i >
  • 03
    me: *in bed with married partner* *rolls over to them* hey them: what me: u still like me rite them: ??? Yeah me: ok but, like like or like
  • 04
    RO @romanrochelle When you tell your mans all the tea cause he your best friend too
  • 05
    Flannery @imdaintyaf Husband: I love you. Me: *eating a potato chip really loudly* You should. I'm a _ miracle. 2,006 8:42 PM - Sep 11, 2016 969 people are talking about this i >
  • 06
    Saw this at my neighbors house this morning SCARIEST THING I COULD THINK OF!
  • 07
    How to immediately infuriate your husband: Not The Worst Mom Refer to something that belongs to him as "ours". you
  • 08
    mum did you want a daughter or a son? wanted back rub
  • 09
    Mommy Owl @Lhlodder Establish dominance in your household by staring at your husband while you unplug his phone from the charger and plug in your own. 3,177 8:38 PM - Nov 22, 2017 1,296 people are talking about this i
  • 10
    beth, an alien @bourgeoisalien Nothing in life can prepare you for how much of marriage is spent just listening to someone cough. 1,243 9:01 PM - May 2, 2016 i 478 people are talking about this >
  • 11
    When my husband tells me in detail about how he just changed our daughter's diaper, I'm like... That's gross. I love it.
  • 12
    Cydni Beer @cydbeer My husband almost fell down the stairs and now we are in a heated debate as to whether my gasp was out of fear for his safety or excitement about a possible life insurance payout.
  • 13
    ME WASHING DISHES MY HUSBAND PREPARING TO WHIP ME IN THE BUTT WITH A KITCHEN TOWEL @MOMOFIANDDONE
  • 14
    ** No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards me literally driving anywhere** Wife: why did you go this way?
  • 15
    the things my dad sends my mom Verizon <Messages (1) April 6:20 PM Tom Today 12:26 PM 94% I Details Today 5:49 PM Today 5:40 PM Why did you send this I thought you liked me Text Message Send
  • 16
    Oh look, my wife's last nerve I want to touch it!
  • 17
    My Wife: OK, hurry up while the kids are distracted Me: @prettyokaydads
  • 18
    No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards My wife asked me to grab her something from the hotel breakfast, and when I asked for suggestions, she said "you know what I like." I've never been so scared in my whole
  • 19
    LEFT MY HUSBAND ALONE FOR 1 HOUR ItsAJeepMeme LilJeepFamily AND THIS HAPPENED.....
  • 20
    She literally just said "Ugh! Why do you have so much beard stuff??!" Degree
  • 21
    When a man washes dishes
  • 22
    Trying to convince my wife I'm excited to go apple picking this weekend Dad& Burjed
  • 23
    Rodney Lacroix @moooooog35 Follow Me: Hey honey, can you get me a cup of coffee? Wife: You have legs. Get it yourself. Me: Our love story should be made into a movie.
  • 24
    Mommy Owl @Lhlodder I'm beginning to think my husband isn't going to apologize for the way he acted in my dream last night.
  • 25
    When he empties the dishwasher and vacuums the floor. MY BODY IS READY
  • 26
    66 [IKEA] *wife wonders where I am* *hears glass break* *knows where I am* - Josh (@iwearaonesie) November 20, 2017
  • 27
    The police just showed up and took the dog!! What!!? Why?!!! Why did I marry you? Unpaid barking tickets
  • 28
    Marriage lets you annoy one special person for the rest of your life. your ecards someecards.com
  • 29
    him: do you know where my- me: in your 2nd drawer, to the bottom right him: how did y- me: I'm better than you not the worst mom
  • 30
    When my wife works in the evening and asks me about my plans while she's gone. 18 WAIT FOR YOU TO GET BACK. AND
  • 31
    WHEN YOUR WIFE IS SICK AND YOU KNOW YOU'RE NEXT HERE IT COMES
  • 32
    66 My husband just texted me from the bathroom and asked me to bring him "A LOT more toilet paper," so yeah, the romance ain't dead people. — hannahannahannah - (@MUMSIEesq) March 8, 2016
  • 33
    When you're in the shower and your wife walks in, so you gotta remind her of the goods N
  • 34
    What's something you do that you'd never tell your SO/spouse about? #admin 137 Comments Like Comment When I'm at the checkout in Target or Walmart I sometimes buy gift cards to restaurants that I love and thennn when I want to go out to eat and hubby says we need to save money I'm like "waiiiiiiit a second! I thinkkkk I have a gift card from last Christmas we haven't used yet!!!!" I search in my pocketbook like I am really not sure....and then...waaaaa laaaa! There it is!!! Off to the Texas Road
  • 35
    EVERY TIME YOU TALK TO YOUR WIFE, YOU SHOULD ALWAYS REMIND YOURSELF... THIS CONVERSATION WILL BE RECORDED FOR TRAINING AND QUALITY PURPOSES'
  • 36
    > Jeff Lyons @usedwigs keeping our marriage fresh/exciting via texts Sat, 01/16/2016 Can you take photo of our toilet seat and send me also brand of toilet 10:12 AM
  • 37
    Special designed bed for married couples after 5 years... For those married for more than 10 years, electric fence is available... @DirtyHumorr
  • 38
    When she says "fine go ahead and do whatever you want" STOP
  • 39
    A woman's ear when.. Husband is on the phone.
  • 40
    Mom Psychologist @mompsychologist Husband: So we've basically given up. Me: On what? H: *gestures to 4yo carefully piling spaghetti on his head*: Parenting.

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