‘You bought another woman undergarments?’: Man Buys His Female Friend Red Undergarments as a ‘Prank,’ Leading to Relationship Dispute

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    r/AITAH 4 days ago Conscious-Jicama2133 AITAH for leaving my 8 boyfriend because he brought his female best- friend lingerie as a 'joke'?
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    My boyfriend (28M) and I (24 F) have been together for a year and a half. I love him a lot, and he has been pretty amazing to me. He is also the sort of person who has lots of friends and his close friends are pretty much family. He also loves to joke and play these harmless pranks on his friends,
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    which sometimes makes me feel weird. Just for context: He has two female friends and three male friends. This is about my bf and one of his friends Claire (28 F). Claire is a nice woman and we are friendly. My boyfriend also has never ignored me in favour of his friends or talked over me in
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    front of them. Which is why I don't understand if I'm in the right.
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    They (my boyfriend's friends) had a recently escalated prank fight. I had made it clear to my bf that I am not good at jokes and am rather stiff, and he said he would keep me out of it. Claire, my boyfriend, and another friend Kyle (27 M), even had a huge throwing 'water-balloons' fight in
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    Kyle's backyard. Then my boyfriend got pranked with dye in his body wash. Then Kyle got pranked by Claire, something about whipping cream and oven mitts. But the issue was when my boyfriend brought a red, lacy, lingerie set, and he planned to put it in Claire's room the next
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    time when he went over. I said it was a tacky prank, and why would he buy lingerie? None of the previous pranks have been of this kind, and it makes me really uncomfortable. I also felt like if I was Claire, I would feel gross about it. But my boyfriend
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    got mad and defensive and told me Claire is 'cool like that', and she would think it's funny. I admit, I get a bit weirded out when he calls Claire 'extremely beautiful' and jokes about how she was always been 'way out of his league'. But I thought it was nothing and they were like family,
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    so I guess it was 'their' thing. However, the lingerie prank had me put my foot down and I said that he was wrong to give another woman lingerie, no matter who, when he had a girlfriend.
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    We fought, and I said I wanted to break up, which he didn't want to and I said that I was just overreacting. He said that I was too conservative and needed to open my mind when he had never given me a reason to be insecure. Claire called me and said that she and my bf have
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    been friends for a long time, and 'inside jokes' are just that, and I'll learn with more age. I still feel weird about this. My best friend is supportive of me no matter what I do, but I have started to feel like I'm blowing this out of proportion. My boyfriend says that the fact that he told me and
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    didn't hide it from me shows that I'm the problem. I have started to feel like I've blown this out of proportion and maybe it's my fault I can't take a joke. I really feel awful about this whole thing. AITAH?
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    Edit: The people asking what the prank is with the lingerie? Apparently, it's an inside joke about how during their college days she had some problems with the color red, and the lingerie would have just given her a shock of some kind I guess? I told my boyfriend it was cruel, but he said
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    boyfriend it was cruel, but he said it wasn't a trauma thing, just an inside joke. Claire also said over the phone that the lingerie thing was just an inside joke of their college days.
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    Le... 4d ago Edited 3d ago NTA. You aren't blowing this out of proportion. How is buying lingerie and putting it in someone's room a prank? "You'll learn with age” - there's a 4 year difference between you and
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    Claire. Does she think in 4 years you'll somehow think buying lingerie is acceptable and somehow can be considered a prank. Girl, I'm in my 40's and I can tell you right now, that would never be an
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    acceptable Inside joke or prank. And you bf telling you you're the problem "because he didn't hide it" from you is just plain trying to manipulate/gaslight you.
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    You don't need him to agree to dump his . You deserve better. Drop him. and Claire too (not literally!)
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    Turbulent_Ebb5669 • 4d ago Wow, how condescending was Claire???? NTA and she just confirmed it.
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    AnemoSpecter 4d ago Claire called me and said that she and my bf have been friends for a long time, and 'inside jokes' are just that, and I'll learn with more age.
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    Tell Claire boundaries exist, and adults respect boundaries. But it's okay if they don't understand, they'll learn with age.
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    GingerPrince72 • 4d ago --admit, I get a bit weirded out when he calls Claire 'extremely beautiful' and jokes about how she was always -- been 'way out of his league'.
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    The bolded part is pretty dodgy. Also, at 28 these endless pranks is pretty childish, what a cheek to patronise you.
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    NTA, I'd be moving on personally, meet a man, not a silly little boy who seems to be in love/lust with his "friend".
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    missing 1776 .4d ago My ex fiance was gifted lingerie on friendship day by her male best friend. I was extremely uncomfortable. We later broke up due to the fact it turns out he escalated it to at some point afterwards.
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    As a man: no man buys a woman underwear unless he wants to see her in it. You don't buy lingerie as a joke gift. The "prank war" is just an excuse that gives him deniability because he is a coward. Sounds to me like you struck to close to the
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    truth for his comfort and he is shocked his perfect deniability plan didn't work.
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    lydocia •4d ago Best case scenario, you're not compatible with this guy. Worst and more likely case, you're a stand-in for the Claire he can't have.
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    Also, you don't need his permission or agreement to break up.
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    Oh-okthen 4d ago NTA. You've done the right thing. If he had a chance with Claire he'd take it. They sound immature and actually really annoying.
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    Crazy_Banshee_333 • 4d ago NTA. Your boyfriend said he thinks Claire is extremely beautiful and way out of his league. He would not have bought her red, lacy lingerie if he did not think of her in a sexual way. Would he prank one of his guy friends with a
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    G-string? I doubt it. Even as a prank, buying someone lingerie is suggestive. I would be ticked off by it, too. What's next? A ? It's very condescending of Claire to suggest you're just being
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    immature. I'm betting she wouldn't like it if her boyfriend bought that for another woman.

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