Boyfriend gets offended when woman tells him he can't come to watch a play with her and her 12-year-old daughter: ‘We can all do something together another time, but this is our “girls’ day”'

Author image for Baiz Hoen
Baiz Hoen
Feb 8, 2025 5:00 PM EST

When you're a girl growing up, there's no day more special than a mother-daughter Girl's Day Out. Maybe you go get mani-pedis, maybe you go on a shopping spree, or maybe you just spend a chill day running errands. No matter what, this mother-daughter bonding experience is second to none, and I, for one, wouldn't miss it for the world. 

One mother had a very special tradition with her daughter for their Girl's Day Out: twice a year, they go to London's West End to see a musical. A perfect way to spend the day, both mother and daughter are lucky to have each other for it. There's one problem this year, though: Mom has a new boyfriend, and he is feeling left out of their plans. He wants to be able to tag along, but Mom stands her ground. Dear reader, I must ask: isn't the point of mother-daughter days to get away from the boys for a minute? If they really wanted to be included, that's why we come home and give them the fashion show after the shopping sprees. Read what this woman has to say to see if she's right to leave her boyfriend out of her Girl's Day Out.

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    My 12yr old daughter and I (not his child) have a tradition where we go into London twice a year to watch a west end show. We make a real "girls day out" out of it. I've booked tickets for us for the summer holidays and mentioned it to my boyfriend- who is aware of our tradition. He immediately got
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    our tradition. He immediately got upset with me for not including him. I said the musical we're going to see wouldn't be something he would like, and regardless, it's a thing we do together just us. Me and him do stuff together all the time when daughter is at her dad's, and have our own plans to go into London separately for something else. We're less than an
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    something else. We're less than an hour away from London so go semi regularly together.
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    He was still getting upset with me telling me that I should have included him and it makes him feel bad I didn't. I tried to explain this is an activity for just my daughter and I and we can all do something together another time, but this is our "girls day". AITA?
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    People in the comments told this woman that she has a right to have a Girl's Day Out.

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    NTA This is something between you and your daughter. If he can't handle that, he is not mature enough for adult relationships.
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    NTA. This is a special tradition between you and your daughter, and there's nothing wrong with keeping it that way. Not everything has
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    that way. Not everything has to be a group activity, especially when you already make time for just you and your boyfriend. It's understandable that he might feel left out, but instead of getting upset, he should respect the bond you have with your daughter. You're
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    with your daughter. You're not excluding him from your life-you're just maintaining something important with her, and that should be okay.
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    Some commenters had to tell this woman the hard truths.

    Now that's some entitlement...what makes him think he's owed an invitation to your tradition with your daughter?? NTA, but maybe this isn't the guy for you.
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    NTA - huge red flag, here. A grown a man should not be jealous of a mother spending time with her daughter.
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    Your boyfriend needs a crash course in Girls Day Out 101. Maybe he can join the next time you go to see How to Not Be Jealous of a Mother- Daughter Bond.
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  • 14

    Who wants a fox in the hen house anyways!

    AITA? Nah, you're just a dedicated Girl's Day CEO! Your boyfriend can plan his own Boys Night Out while you and your daughter conquer London one musical at a time.
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    Get with the program and maybe you'll get included next time!

    Your boyfriend needs to work on his girl day skills! Maybe he should start practicing by binge-watching rom-coms and perfecting his tea- making abilities.
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  • 16
    NTA. Your tradition with your daughter is special, and it's okay to have that just for the two of you. You already make time for your boyfriend in other ways, so he shouldn't be upset about this. Not everything has to include him.
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    NTA. You're an awesome mom. Your boyfriend doesn't sound like a good fit for your family if he doesn't understand what you and your daughter are doing. Good luck OP!
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  • 18
    NTA. One on one bonding time with your child is really important. He's being super weird and possessive about this.
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  • 19
    NTA And this could be that he's just not ready or able to date someone with a kid.
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    NTA. You are allowed to have time with your child one on one without having to justify it. I'm guessing this is a new boyfriend, since you do this twice a year. It's also important to set caring but firm boundaries with new partners when it comes to your relationship with your children.
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    If you give him the benefit of the doubt in that he is upset because he wants to be part of your family dynamic and feels left out, that's nice that it means so much to him, but still - he needs to understand that just as he gets time alone with you, so does your daughter, and he needs to respect that boundary.
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    You're not the a hole. It's a special tradition between you and your daughter, and it's okay to have that time just for the two of you.
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  • 23
    NTA ... but stop explaining it to him. You have done that and he doesn't like the explanation repeating it isn't - going to change it. Ignore his moody tantrum and enjoy your time with your daughter. Please continue this tradition with her... he should build a bridge and get over it.
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    Totally NTA. I like to spend time with each of my kids, and am constantly encour my husband to do things with just one kid at a time.
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family drama aita musicals tradition reddit story motherdaughter family reddit thread daughter Reddit
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