Pregnant wife eats steak and potatoes in front of husband every night while serving him catfish, husband calls her out: 'A selfish woman using pregnancy as an excuse to be selfish'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 15, 2025 6:00 PM EDT

Steak is a special occasion food, at least in my house. We were definitely celebrating something if we were bellying up to a steak. It was somebody's birthday, graduation, anniversary, or Christmas. It wasn't just a weeknight dinner to gnaw on while we watched Wheel of Fortune. Of course, not every family operates this way. Perhaps some of you are running around with monocles looking like Mr. Monopoly, settling into a Steak Diane every Tuesday night. But I'd wager that most families are like mine, and steak was a rare treat. 

So it makes sense to me why the husband in this story would feel some type of way about his wife eating steak every night while he was served up whatever else she felt like making. The problem arose, though, when he didn't communicate his desires. We learn when we're kids that we have to use our words, or else we will never get what we want. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10479893248
    via Unsplash+ (Natalia Blauth)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • The internet folks who weighed in on this story, though, were of two minds. Some thought she was completely in the right for making her own meal- after all, she was pregnant and the one making the food. Others thought she could have done more to keep him in the loop. Read on for the story.

  • 02

    AITA for feeding my family a fish dinner while I eat steak and potatoes

    I am three months pregnant and almost everyday I've been craving steak and sour cream baked potatoes. I never really cared for steak I'm more of a chicken fingers and fries girlie but I'm guessing the baby must've loved steak in its past life because that literally all I crave when I don't even care for it.
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
  • 03
    Today I made my family baked pizza spaghetti with fried catfish a lunch eat salad (salad with chopped deli meat) and dinner rolls. I of course am making the same dish I've been eating for almost everyday these last few months. I pretty much make 2 separate meals each night for my cravings.
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
  • 04
    Last night after I served the kids and was getting ready to make my finances plate he expressed he wanted steak and potatoes like me. Mind you he was aware of the menu because I have my meals planned night before. I told him I only had that one steak for me. He said "well we can share" I politely
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
  • 05
    told him that I will need to eat all of my food since I am feeding for two and this is all I have for the night knowing I'll most likely still be hungry whilst you guys have a meal you can come back for seconds. I am now, in his words a "selfish woman using pregnancy as an excuse to be selfish". I asked
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
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    what's different about today than all the other days when I've been literally eating the same sh almost everyday with no complaints? He said nothing but shook his head and said " it's the principle bae" and just walked off. We've barely spoken since. Just a dry good morning and goodbyes. AITA?
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
  • 07
    Maybe if he expressed that he wanted the same thing as me I would have prepared for it but he literally always eats what I make. I didn't know I had to be a mind reader.
    via u/readywhipped_velvet
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    Cheezburger Image 10479892736
    via Unsplash+ (Curated Lifestyle)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09

    Some commenters came to the wife's side.

    ParkAlexis 7d ago . NTA You're already making two separate meals every single night to satisfy your cravings while still feeding the entire family. That alone is more than enough. The fact that this man had a whole a
    via u/ParkAlexis
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    meal in front of him, one that you took the time to plan and cook, yet decided to sulk and guilt-trip you because he suddenly wanted what was on your plate is ridiculous. If "the principle" is so important to him, then he can
    via u/ParkAlexis
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    get his a in the kitchen and cook his own steak next time. You are growing a whole human inside you. You don't have time to be dealing with a grown man acting like a pouty toddler who didn't get the same Happy Meal toy.
    via u/ParkAlexis
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    shontsu . 7d ago Nope, he's just being a If he wants steak, he uses his words (before dinner is ready, ideally before the shopping is done) and asks for steak. Wanting to take half the meal off his pregnant wife is whats selfish. NTA, hopefully this isn't a sign of whats to come.
    via u/shontsu
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    Special_Hedgehog... . 7d ago NTA, but you might want to get your iron levels checked. Craving red meat can be a sign of low iron.
    via u/Special_Hedgehog8368
  • 14

    Others questioned her dinner choices.

    snizzrizz • 7d ago I'd be pretty p ed if someone made me spaghetti pizza, catfish and deli meat salad and presented it to me as food too
    via u/snizzrizz
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    deepspacenineoneone 7d ago • I know we're all supposed to just be helpful and answer the question, but I'm flabbergasted that almost no one else is commenting on the dinner menu combination being absolutely vile. Just a salty, acidic mess of unrelated foods.
    via u/deepspacenineoneone
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    Pisces_darkchild • 6d ago Let's not forget the part where she eats steak and baked potatoes every night while feeding her family whatever fell out of the fridge. I've cooked for a house full of people. Am I the only one who thinks that you should ask the people who you are cooking for what they might like to eat?
    via u/Pisces_darkchild
  • 17

    Some blamed both sides.

    SourPatchPhoenix • 7d ago ESH. Your fiance is sulking like a child. He's a grown up who can use his words to ask for a different dinner while there's time to accommodate, and/or he can make it his self. And, you're being unreasonably unaccommodating. You're not "eating for two" in the first
    via u/SourPatchPhoenix
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    trimester, and the actual additional caloric requirement in the second trimester works out to an ounce of cheese or an apple - basically an extra snack. As someone who hates pineapple with a passion but ate a ton of it while pregnant I understand the power of pregnancy
    via u/SourPatchPhoenix
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    cravings; but let's be real, it's not 'no you can't have a few bites of my steak or I will be 100% completely unsatisfied and simply cannot eat ANYTHING else to make up for it!!"
    via u/SourPatchPhoenix
  • 20
    solarama 7d ago • ESH he should use his - words when you meal prep & his comment is trash, but if you really eating steak erry nite in front of them, while the rest of the family eats less expensive protein, yeah that's a problem. Why aren't you
    via u/solarama
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    buying extra & sharing? Or eating it for lunch instead, since you must eat other foods throughout the day/week? Unless these are 'patio steaks, you're coming across real pregnancy- entitled here
    via u/solarama
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    KaliTheBlaze 7d ago • NTA. If he wanted to join you in having steak, he needed to tell you when you had the ability to make more. If you've been having steak almost every night, he knows that you've been eating that a lot, and he could have told you when you were meal planning that he would like one, too.
    via u/KaliTheBlaze
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    He's not necessarily wrong for asking if there was enough to share. If he was smart, he really should have done that when you were starting to prep to cook at the latest, so you could adjust how much you were making of each dinner option to have enough
    via u/KaliTheBlaze
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    if you had enough ingredients (and that way, if you didn't have a second steak you could cook, he'd have had some time to either adjust his own expectations and try to be satisfied with what you were making for everybody else or go get another steak
    via u/KaliTheBlaze
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    so there would be enough to fix him one, too). But once he knew there wasn't enough to share, he needed to shrug and say oh well and eat what he knew you planned last night.
    via u/KaliTheBlaze
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    teawithmochi • 7d ago . May I ask how old your husband is? I noticed that you posted a few months ago that you're 23 with 4 kids, this one being the 5th. You would think after this many kids he would get the memo; the silent treatment is awfully immature.
    via u/teawithmochi
  • 27
    You cooked a meal he knew about in advance. He knew that you would be having steak (as you have been) and he knew that he would be having fish even before you started cooking... it's selfish to wait so long to let you know that he changed his mind and to beg for half your plate as if he can't very well cook some steak for himself.
    via u/teawithmochi
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    Also, if he had an issue with you eating "better" than him, he should have made that clear beforehand, not after months of you eating steak with no problem. He's in the wrong. NTA at ALL.
    via u/teawithmochi
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    Mimi6671 7d ago • YTA and yeah, kind of selfish too. Since you have been eating this everyday, you really couldn't have shared this time and told him to give you a heads up next time he wants steak too? I mean, it's one meal. You would not have perished from eating a smaller piece of steak one night, just saying.
    via u/Mimi6671

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