'She said he had no right to drain their accounts for me': Estranged dad gives 21-year-old daughter belated child support money in an attempt to make good on abandoning her, new wife demands she return the money

Advertisement
  • 01

    AITA for not giving my estranged father's wife the money he sent me?

    Cheezburger Image 10489129472
  • 02
    My father wasn't in my (21f) life growing up. He left mom and me when I was 2 and refused to pay child support. He quit his job when he was tracked down for support and he spent time in jail rather than pay.
  • 03
    Eventually mom stopped fighting because it was going nowhere. She felt like it was wasting resources chasing after him when it was obvious he was going to avoid it however he could.
  • 04
    Cheezburger Image 10489120000
  • 05
    A couple of years ago he moved about an hour away and I saw him for the first time since a court appearance when I was 8. We didn't speak either of those times but it surprised me that he came back. I found out he was married and had more kids from
  • 06
    my paternal aunt. He'd reached out to her and wanted to reconnect and she told him where to go. She was always pretty disgusted he walked away like he did and refused to support me financially.
  • 07
    In December my aunt told me he went to her house and left something for me there. I asked her what it was and she had no idea but she said it was in an envelope. I opened it and it was a check. And it was a big one too. I tried giving it to my mom but she
  • 08
    told me to keep it and he owed me. That he abandoned me. And it was the least I deserved. I tried telling her she deserved it more but she wouldn't even entertain the idea. So after confirming it was legit I lodged it into my account.
  • 09
    COMPANY INC
  • 10
    Then his wife came looking for the money by going to my aunt's house for me. My aunt made her leave and I wasn't even there but she showed up a few days later when I was there and she demanded the
  • 11
    money. She said it was money that was meant to go on her kids. That he had no right to drain their accounts for me. I told her it wasn't my problem and my aunt threatened to call the cops.
  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 10489119744
  • 13
    She showed up at my aunts house again a few days after and my aunt followed through and called the cops. But apparently this woman left the message that I was selfish and entitled and I stole it from her kids. AITA?
  • 14
    Mother_Search3350 You stole nothing. Her kids have beeeen supported by that deadbeat all their lives as she DGAF whether you were dead or alive or if you had food to eat or clothes to wear. That's all the back child support that deadbeat owes you like your mom said.
  • 15
    You are entitled to that money and did not steal anything from anyone. Keep calling the cops every time she shows up.
  • 16
    She chose to marry and have kids with a deadbeat who ghosted his own child for 19 years. Karma has finally found her address. NTAH
  • 17
    totaleffectofthesun Yes, tell her to go pound sand, get a restraining order if need be. The gall of her to ask for that is insane.
  • 18
    Dschingis Khaaaaan NTA - If she had a legitimate claim to the money she could make it through the courts. She's harassing you because she probably doesn't. Save the money for your future, he gave it to you so it belongs to you.
  • 19
    Wic-a-ding-dong Well, to be fair, even if it was her money that was deposited on her saving account and he found a way to get to that money even though his name wasn't on the account: she would still have no legitimate claim to the money. What's his is hers and what's hers is his: you can't legally steal from your spouse.
  • 20
    RasilBathbone NTA. Not your monkey, not your circus. Your absent dad is definitely TA for you, and it seems like he's being TA to his current family as well. But you are no less entitled to that money than they are, and his
  • 21
    current wife isn't entitled to harass you or his sister over an issue she has with him. You aunt was right to involve the police, and she should do it again if it happens again. Take your mom out for a nice dinner, and then use the money in whatever way is best for you.
  • 22
    spacemouse21 NTA. I have no idea nor do you what the dynamic is between him and his wife. I have no idea nor do you how much money is really going to her and the kids. Take him at his word the money was earmarked for you and mom, so it's your money that's it. No idea if she's just trying to rip you and your mom off. Move
  • 23
    she's just trying to rip you and your mom off. Move along nothing to see here. Unless you want to reach out to him and ask him directly, which actually would be the thing to do. is he really trying to make amends? Is he on the outs with his current family and just trying to get back in touch and in your good graces?
  • 24
    Con4America NTA> Do NOT give that woman a single cent. You deserve that money because he was supposed to pay child support all those years. Take care of your mom when she needs it with the money. It's the respectful thing to do.
  • 25
    discuss this in private. I feel defeated and angry and I also hate her family with my soul. They knew they were hurting our relationship and they didn't care. She knew that I'm a private person who hates being invaded. I helped them because I love her and I didn't have the b > to let them go to sleep in their

Tags

Scroll Down For The Next Article