“You can tell who the favorite kid is”: Man spends $10k on youngest son’s wedding, but $30k on eldest, causing favoritism dispute

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Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Apr 27, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

Weddings should be a day of convivial fun, good vibes, and effusive love energetically traveling through the air. Your friends and family come from distant places, maybe even abroad, to see you happy with the love of your life, to tie the eternal knot of your undying love and desire. Most people say that their weddings go by so quickly that it feels like a blur. So much money, effort, and time to feel like you just had a blur in front of your eyes. 

That's the thing about weddings, they're incredibly expensive. Most people can't afford them on their own, not to mention paying for a honeymoon and probably a home immediately after. People usually rely on parents or other family members to pay for their wedding. This makes sense, and with rising divorce rates, a question mark enters the realm of finances for the wedding. 

In the story below, it centers around a father and his two sons. He's paid for both of their weddings, but one needs to get married again and expects his father to fork up the funds once again. Read the full story for all the juicy details.  

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  • 01

    AITA for not paying for my son's wedding?

    "Decent people don't flaunt their favoritism"
    via kkshepel from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    My wife and I have 2 sons. My youngest was the first to get married. We spent about 10K on his wedding.
    via Reddit
  • 03
    Then when my oldest got married because years had passed and 10K was not enough for a wedding anymore we gave him 30K. I believe we treated them equally because 5 years had passed between the weddings so realistically it would be unfair if we gave my oldest 10K as well.
    via Reddit
  • 04
    Now my youngest is getting remarried and he thinks we should pay for his second wedding as well. I told him that this is not happening. We are only willing to pay for one wedding. The second wedding is his own responsibility.
    via Reddit
  • 05
    He thinks I'm an a_h_le. I think he is an adult and if he can't pay for his own wedding he shouldn't get married.
    via Reddit
  • 06
    Exact Setting9562 • 21h ago Well you can tell who the favourite kid is.
    via u/Exact Setting9562

  • Let us know in the comments below what you think. Should the father fork up the funds for his younger son's second wedding because he paid more for his eldest son's wedding, or should he stick to his opinions and not pay for a second wedding? Lots to think about here. 

  • 07
    Cheezburger Image 10498036480
    via Space_Cat from Getty Images / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 08
    Potential-Sprinkles4 21h ago I think on one hand asking for money for the second marriage or feeling entitled to it is super whack. YET you gave your older sone 3 times as much when realistically the difference to 5 years ago would have been 13-15k so i
    via u/Potential-Sprinkles4
  • 09
    see where hes coming from. You spent way more for your second son, i think i would be a bit grumpy too tbh.
    via u/Potential-Sprinkles4
  • 10
    Idratherbesleepingzz • 21h ago I understand your point about not feel obligated to pay for your son's second wedding, but you need to stop being delusional. You literally gave your eldest son triple the amount of money for his wedding. You're not the AH
    via u/Idratherbesleepingzz
  • 11
    for not wanting to pay for the second wedding, but you are the AH for treating your children differently.
    via u/Idratherbesleepingzz
  • 12
    Amazing-Wave4704 21h ago Five years and you TRIPLED the amount you gave your older son. Daddy has a favorite. YTA
    via u/Amazing-Wave4704
  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 10498036224
    via EternityPictures from pixabay / Canva

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 14
    JetBoyJetGirl13 • 21h ago $10k five years ago equals $12,356 in today's US dollars. So you gave your oldest 2.5 times more than your youngest.
    via u/JetBoyJetGirl13
  • 15
    It's your money, so you can do whatever you want with it. But if you believe that you should treat your sons equally, when it comes to monetary gifts, then you should agree to give the younger son the difference for his wedding.
    via u/JetBoyJetGirl13
  • 16
    needsleepcoffee • 21h ago ESH. Him for expecting you to pay for a second wedding and you for trying to make that you blabbed about five years meaning the older brother needed triple the money
    via u/needsleepcoffee
  • 17
    MauraSully 17h ago Geez inflation wasn't $20k. I'd be annoyed if I was your younger son too. It definitely looks like you favor your older child. You gave way more than what was necessary to the oldest.
    via u/MauraSully
  • 18
    KosmikZA 20h ago • ESH. The difference is too large between the two but expecting a second marriage paid is some major entitlement.
    via u/KosmikZA
  • 19
    dncrmom • 21h ago YTA you gave your youngest 10K and your oldest 30K. Inflation in 5 years is no where near 3 times the amount. At best it should have been 12- 15K. You are correct that he is an adult BUT in no way did you treat them fairly or the same.
    via u/dncrmom
  • 20
    Jealous Tie_8404 • 15h ago Hey, lots of people have a favorite child, but decent people don't flaunt their favoritism.
    via u/Jealous Tie_8404
  • 21
    You gave one son 30K and one son 10K. Nobody believes this is "equal" not even you. YTA
    via u/Jealous Tie_8404
  • 22
    Jack_of_Spades • 21h ago YTA for treating them so differently. Five years doesn't TRIPLE the cost of everything. I think if you had been equitable, you wouldn't be getting asked right now. But he saw you drop an additional 20k and that was apparantly
    via u/Jack_of_Spades
  • 23
    fine, so he felt it would be reasonable if you were willing to do the same for him. Not another 30k but 10 or 20 to help since you did the same for his brother. It doesn't seem entitled to think "Oh, so that's what normal is for you?"
    via u/Jack_of_Spades

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