30-year-old daughter-in-law working for mother-in-law's family farm business quits job after MIL accuses her of trying to take over, leading to a family dispute: ‘I’ve stepped back completely’

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    Local THE
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    AITA for quitting my mother-in-law’s business out of nowhere and not wanting to deal with the awkwardness at home?

    I (F, 30s) worked for my mother-in-law in the family business for years. It wasn't just a job it was tied into our whole life, since we live on the family farm and are constantly around each other.
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    From the start, I was promised growth, a role, even a title. But over time, I realized I wasn't being included or trusted.
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    I was told not to talk to anyone about things, while watching others get opportunities and attention.
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    Whenever I tried to bring up my discomfort, it got brushed off. The first big crack came when I took a day off for my son's birthday.
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    I thought it would be simple, but it turned into some kind of loyalty test. That left me feeling deeply hurt, but I stayed on for months afterward, trying to push through.
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    The final straw came when she accused me of trying to take her business. That cut me to the core - I had been giving everything I could, and the idea that I was some kind of threat was devastating.
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    At that point, I quit. Meanwhile, on the family side, Mommom (husband's grandmother) treats my stepkids like her "do-over" kids.
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    It feels dismissive of me and unhealthy for the family dynamic. Between that and the work situation, I reached my breaking point.
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    Now, I've stepped back completely. I don't want to be involved in the business, and I don't want to engage with the family drama.
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    But since we still live on the farm and share meals, there's constant awkwardness. Part of me wonders if I'm the a hle for pulling away - like maybe I should have kept trying, or handled things differently.
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    FAMILY BUSINESS
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    But another part of me knows I stayed way longer than I should have and only quit when I was accused of something that wasn't true.
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    So... AITA for quitting the way I did and for not wanting to do anything with them anymore?
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    notAugustbutordinary Where is your husband in all of this?
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    OP cicibreezy We've only been married a year, and honestly, to him this setup is his dream. From his perspective, it's perfect multiple family members around to help take care of the kids while he has the freedom to do what he wants. The problem is that for me, it feels like I gave up my own home and independence for this, and now I'm stuck in a situation where my kids don't even sleep in the same space as me. What feels like "support" to him feels like constant surveillance and a lack of bounda
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    haraz786 NTA. Once someone accuses you of trying to steal their business after you've put in years of effort, that's the point of no return. You can't work somewhere you're not trusted.
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    MniPenguin You can step back from a place where you are not appreciated, but it's important to communicate that.
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    holdon_painends Info: Where is your husband? Have you spoken to him about everything? What did he say? Has he spoken to his mother or grandmother about your concerns? Have they *always* disliked you or is this recent? It honestly just sounds like they don't like you and put up with you bc you provide (probably) cheap and or free labor and have kids.
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    seguefarer You didn't quit out of nowhere. Don't frame it that way, and don't let them frame it that way. You quit a de d end job with a hostile boss.
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    cassowary32 NTA. It might be time to consider if this marriage is really working for you. Have you find another job?
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    AnyAd5106 I am confused. You worked for MIL for years but you've only been married a year?
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    Quiet_Village_1425 NTA but move away or get divorced for your own sanity!!

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