Man considers leaving 6-figure front desk job because he doesn't 'fit in' with wealthy environment: 'I just feel like I’m faking it all day'

Author image for JR Atkinson
JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Mar 6, 2026 10:00 AM EST

Do you feel like you're faking your personality at work?

Most jobs require some level of masking, especially customer service ones. You can't go around saying how you feel all the time because then you'd scare away all the customers. You have to pretend like you want to be there and that your true passion is selling children's clothing and that you aren't just thinking about what you're going to eat for dinner and what might happen on the next episode of Yellowjackets. All jobs ask for some level of pretending. Pretending you care, pretending you had enough sleep, pretending to laugh at your boss's cheesy jokes. We all do it, and we all kind of resent doing it. Maybe you have a job where you get to fully let your freak flag fly all the time, and I commend you for that. But then you have to ask if people are faking it for your benefit. 

The upside of doing this at work is that you get compensated to do it. You're not playing pretend for free; you're doing it for a paycheck and to further your career. This is the generally understood push and pull of adulthood. But certain jobs require more of you than others. Certain jobs make you feel more insane than others and require different levels of masking. It's up to you to decide just how much of that you're comfortable with, and just how much you can tolerate.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • A male receptionist talks on the phone while smiling at the front desk
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • The man in this story was caught between what his job required of him and what he was willing to give. Despite being compensated handsomely, he didn't feel like he could be himself at work. And that's a tough feeling, no doubt. But he wondered if the big paycheck was worth it to trade in part of his identity every day. We all make this bargain to some degree, and we all have different comfort levels with it. So he reached out to the internet to get a temperature check on how others would feel about it. And for the most part, he got a reality check he might not have been expecting.

  • I work in a very "high end" dental office in NYC. But my personality doesn't fit. However I am paid well. I don't know what to do.

    32 year old male. I am from Queens, NY, but work on Madison Ave at a dental clinic with very "high standards" and wealthy people. However I am more of a common New Yorker. I have a little bit of New York accent. I'm more down to earth and don't really have that "I am better than you because I have money
    via u/Greg1994
  • attitude" that some of people in midtown Manhattan have. I work at the front desk, surrounded by all women, and deal with patients all day. Since it's a fee for service practice, all patients pay in card, check or, cash and expect top notch service, which I understand. I'm talking very wealthy millionaires with even
    via u/Greg1994
  • some billionaires and celebrities. I make close to 6 figures for a front desk job. I am grateful for it. However, I feel like my personality doesn't fit. I am more of Queens kind of guy, I have a little accent, and I don't seem to fit the kind of model that this office environment seeks, which is
    via u/Greg1994
  • someone who is extremely proper in everything they do or say. I am very professional to everyone I speak to. I don't talk in a way that is non professional. I get I am talking to a certain "kind" of class who pay good money to our office.
    via u/Greg1994
  • I took this job for that reason, because of the salary and because I do know the head of the practice personally through family. I thought my career would kind of take off from here. However, I just feel like I'm "faking it" all day. I have to speak more soft, I have to make sure I am calling everyone Mr. and
    via u/Greg1994
  • Mr./Ms. no matter what situation. These aren't necessarily hard things to do, I just feel like I'm wearing a mask all day. It's tiring. On top of that, our staff is severely micromanaged. You can't make any small mistake, if you do your called into the boss office. You have to put files on the doctors desk in a certain way
    via u/Greg1994
  • and certain position, and if you mess that up and he notices he'll tell you. What im trying to get to is that im a professional, I understand you have to adjust to your environment. However I didn't realize the mental exhaustion that comes with this. To turn on a "fake me" for the whole day dealing with
    via u/Greg1994
  • sometimes nasty and demanding patients. I'm starting to think maybe it's just the wrong culture for me and I made a mistake, however I have a 6 month old daughter and am getting married in 3 months.I have expenses. I can't just drop what I'm doing and look elsewhere. At least for right m now. Any advice how to handle this kind of situation?
    via u/Greg1994

  • Commenters gave a reality check to this worker.

    Brownie-0109 Many many people would k I to have your job Obviously, you're bothered by all of this. The only thing that sounds bad to me are the toxic customers. I'd still put up with it for the salary
    via u/Brownie-0109
  • Two customers check in at the front desk with a male receptionist.
    via Unsplash+ (Getty Images)

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • QuitaQuites We all adjust to fit the job. Especially in any customer service, you say Mr or Ms, you put things down a certain way so the people doing the actual services can effectively do their job. That's why you're paid so much, for this experience. That's the job. If you don't want it then quit, but that seems like a terrible idea right now.
    via u/QuitaQuites
  • VFTM Your entire first paragraph and part of your second just seems to be a you problem. Get over whatever class issues you have. You are there as customer service to rich people. It's not that deep.
    via u/VFTM
  • As for being micromanaged, it s ks. It IS exhausting. But lots of well paying jobs are tiring! The only thing you can do is keep looking for another job, but I don't know how much you could expect it to be "easier".
    via u/VFTM
  • Hu... You have to put files on the doctors desk in a certain way and certain position, and if you mess that up and he notices he'll tell you. The doctor has a way of reviewing files that's consistent and efficient, that's called standard work not micromanagement.
    via u/Hungry-Quote-1388
  • Of course he'll tell if you do it incorrectly. Following instructions is part of having a job.
    via u/Hungry-Quote-1388
  • ca... You're caught up in the day to day sameness. You are on the path to self sabotage and regret. You need to take a break and reset your mindset. You need to value the job if you want to keep it. You should start a job search so that you compare and put things into
    via u/catdog1111111
  • perspective. You'll find it hard to get a good job without the nepotism, and less pay for more BS. If you want an improved job without good pay, develop the marketable skills and work towards a career. If you can fo homework at work, you can occupy yourself with satisfying goals and move forward to a future you anticipate.
    via u/catdog1111111
  • You read as if you resent being surrounded by women. That you think they're better than you but you feel you're better. Try to look past your self imposed classism and see them as people. Try to be charming and friendly instead of fake. See if you can make them smile so that your connecting on a personal level.
    via u/catdog1111111
  • Probwfls Totally get where you're coming from but 90% of white collar or service workers have to adjust their personality or "act" to some degree. It's not a tragedy and not to be r de, but you're a bit old to be seriously put out by that. It's the way of the world.
    via u/Probwfls
  • I sometimes feel in my (corporate) line of work that my success is capped a bit bc I didn't go to certain schools, or grow up a certain way. Like the well off speak a certain code that I don't, which allows them to find each other and make better relationships. I can be too down to earth and sometimes I feel eyebrows. raising at me (real or imagined).
    via u/Probwfls
  • But honestly the less I worry about this sh, the better things seem to go. Easier said than done but do a good job and usually things will work in your favor.
    via u/Probwfls
  • Impressive-Grape... We all have to fake it to some extent in the workplace, so I think most people feel the same way you do. But instead of focusing on that, you need to learn to compartmentalize work vs personal life. Focus on your high salary for now - most people would be thrilled to be making six figures. Save up and decide what you want to do in the future.
    via u/Impressive-Grape-119
  • Turbulent-Deman... It sounds like you are dealing with imposter syndrome. I get it. I work in a different industry but at a corporate level. I come from a very modest background. Think midwest trailer park. I stay true to myself by being myself. I am always
    via u/Turbulent-Demand873
  • professional but I stay true to myself. I'm good at what I do and I deserve to be where I am. I am thankful every single day for the job that I have that enables me to have the life that I do. There are so many people that are not as fortunate. You mention you talk
    via u/Turbulent-Demand873
  • different. I do too. My Midwestern accent comes out at times. I call it my Hoosier hillbilly in jest. But it is part of who I am. It helped make me the person I am. I'm not "less" because of it.
    via u/Turbulent-Demand873
  • amandathepanda51 I would say have a goal and if you don't want to continue then don't. Make a plan to save and once you have achieved your savings goal syou can taste your freedom. Just knowing you are somewhere because you
    via u/amandathepanda51
  • choose to be for the money must soften your frustrations somewhat. As for faking it that's life sadly. Best of luck to you. I also have a job with pay but I'm kind of stuck there due to health issues. Ah well.
    via u/amandathepanda51
  • Massive Ear5017 Youre paid well, in a clean enviroment, with quality and standards. Pls reevaluate your own feelings and see it for what it is, a very nice job. If you were asking to aim higher, sure.. but aiming lower?
    via u/Massive_Ear5017

Want More? Follow Us and Add Us as a Preferred Source on Google.

Tags

customer service workplace-stories Professional At Work work faking it wealthy workplace rich people desk job money
Scroll Down For The Next Article