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20 Dad Jokes That'll Get Your Eyes Rolling

These are the most classic of classic bad dad jokes. Send 'em to every dad you know. Or just every person in your list of email contacts. Or stop strangers on the street and tell them a joke (if they look like they need to hear one). Honestly, these jokes are so bad/good that everyone deserves to hear them. If you still need more father humor, here are some Bad Jokes or check out these Cringeworthy Dad Jokes.

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  • 1
    Red - How do you know how heavy a red hot chili pepper is? Give it a weigh, give a weigha give it a weigh now..
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  • 2
    Text - My wife told me she actually likes the way I look with a beard. I told her, "Yeah, it's growing on me"
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  • 3
    Text - Boss: "How good are you at PowerPoint?" Me: "I Excel at it." Boss: "Was that a Microsoft Office pun?" Me: "Word"
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  • 4
    Sea turtle - What did the seal with a broken arm say to the shark? Do not consume if seal is broken
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  • 5
    Font - Wednesday Thursday Lused to have a job at ca calendarfactory... was fired because ltook a couple of days off. 13 14
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  • 6
    White - Want to hear a joke about paper? Never mind it's tearable.
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  • 7
    Citric acid - Why did the orange stop rolling down the hill? Because it ran out of juice
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  • 8
    Food - Have you all heard about the top secret bakery? It's on a knead to dough basis.
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  • 9
    Pen - Never trust omeone with graph pape... They're always plotting something
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  • 10
    Text - My dad always used to say, The sky's the limit!" Which is probably why he got fired from his job at N.A.S.A
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  • 11
    Child - If a child refuses to sleep during nap time, are they guilty of resisting a rest?
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  • 12
    Water - I wanted to tell you my chemistry joke... but I was afraid that l'd get the wrong reaction
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  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 9518496512
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  • 14
    Stethoscope - I told my doctor that I broke my arm in two places. He told me to stop going to those places. LAMAL
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  • 15
    Product - Why was the lawyer broke? She kept giving away free trials.
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  • 16
    Footwear - My Dad died due to us not being able to remember his blood type. As he died, hekept insisting that we "be positive", but it's hard without him.
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  • 17
    Text - OMELD oc AUHTS/9. Interviewer asked meif l'd be a good waiter Well, you could say bring a lot to the table.
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  • 18
    Text - What kind of person wears two watches at once? Someone with too much time on their hands
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  • 19
    Bald eagle - What did the Canadian eagle say? "I'm soary"
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  • 20
    Did you know alligators can grow up to 15 feet? But most have 4
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