Memes & Tweets To Soothe That Monday Pain

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    Product - Timon and Pumbaa Any issue ELEDR PASTE Hakuna Matata ELEX FASTE
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    Soldier - me and the Boys playing a game that only one of us is experinced at
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    Text - Professor Snape @_Snape_ How to break up with someone: Give them a sock and tell them they are a free elf now 1:41 PM · 6/25/20 · Twitter Web App
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    Text - Village Person @SvnSxty Her: I like a man who's loud in bed Me: *turns on my cpap machine* Her: Not like that 7:01 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Product - "Maam, I'm going to place you on a brief hold" UN 12EGGS SKER
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    Photo caption - When the teacher adds memes to the PowerPoint and no one laughs Why is no one having agood time? Ospecifically requested it. made with mematic
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    Text - Bean @slimthicccins Autocorrect is fine, butthole l wish it didn't always choose your most frequently used words as replacements. 12:11 PM · 4/11/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - Whale Shark @Vhalechark Me: could you pass me the Washington Shire sauce Her: the what? Me: the Westminster Shore sauce Her: are you having a stroke? Me: the Warcaster Shiner sauce Her: hello, 911? I need an ambulance- Me: the Willmington Scone sauce Her: please, it's getting worse Me: the Wank- 12:26 PM · 5/27/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - rachannonymous @rachann79 When shopping, if we've already made small talk then later I see you on another aisle, I'll awkwardly say, "Are you stalking me?" If I see you a third time, we must battle to the death. 10:40 AM · 5/16/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - O grayscale pollyanna @Fruittaang I keep getting this ad for a game where a girl has a positive pregnancy test, she shows her man and he just jets away on a scooter and thenI guess you help her renovate her house? Like, good on her but wtf Imao 3:23 AM · 6/22/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - déia @partygirlu2 therapy: expensive benedict cumberbatch saying pengwings about 60 times: free THE IMITATION GAME
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    Text - Elon Musk @elonmusk en 69 days after 4 Only a matter of time before someone steals a Tesla while playing GTA on a Tesla 10:57 PM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - Jessie @mommajessiec I woke up with intense lower back pain and it could be from any number of activities I did yesterday: laying on the couch, sitting on the couch, eating on the couch, sleeping on the couch... 7:23 PM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - Christina, mostly merciless @Aikiwomannc ... When l'm old I'm getting waves tattooed on my upper arms so I can shake them when I go in for a hug and yell, "TSUNAMI!" 1:34 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - Wilbur Oscar @BeerDadWiseAss Welcome to your 40's. Your short term memory isn't good enough to use Snapchat. 12:16 PM · 6/22/20 · Twitter Web App
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    Text - Forward March @RunOldMan I used to complain that bars closed at 3 am, now I complain about insomnia at 3 am. 6:57 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - Yukon Guzman D @GrahamKritzer You google Chechnya once and now your inbox has emails from Trip Advisor for hotels in Grozny. Let's gear down here Google, no one is going to Chechnya. 6:42 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter Web App
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    Text - Réal Funghi a @realfunghi Apparently, leaving your old printer in front of a Best Buy wrapped in a blanket inside a basket is not how you're supposed to dispose of it. 1:48 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - The Untastic Mr. Fitz @UnFitz Exclamation points are like drugs. The more you use them the less effective they become. 5:33 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - A Bearer Of Dad News @HomeWithPeanut My 4-year-old asked my 2-year-old if it was time to fight. 2 checked the calendar and said, "No, not yet." Well, at least they are organized. 7:02 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - Dapperilla @Gorilla_Turd I've never lost at a board game because of my unfailing trick of flipping the board when I'm about to. 6:57 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - Unsolicited Butt Pics @Joshsweat52 Normal people after two coffees: *a little chatty perhaps* Me after two coffees: *that woman at the end of Flashdance* 7:03 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Text - Eternal Samnation @portmanteauface Silent letters are the throw pillows of the English language 12:09 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Face - BOYS PLAYING VIDEOGAMES BOYS PLAYING VIDEOGAMES WITH A GIRL WITH THE BOYS Oh dear, oh dear. Gorgeous. You fucking donkey.
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    Text - WILL O Black Lives Matter @ThelntComShow My brain: It's 3am. I feel like we should get up and do something. Or do you want to watch a movie? Also my brain: It's 8am. We've had coffee. I think we can call it a successful day, and go to sleep 6:47 AM · 6/25/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - mark @TheCatWhisprer My wife just suggested that we change into something more comfortable, so you know what that means. Spaghetti night. It's spaghetti night. 2:40 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for iPad
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    Face - Girl on instagram: *shows off her ass* The door behind her:
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    Text - That Pesky Prostitüt™ @LittleMissAngr1 Sometimes the internet is col but oftentimes it is very very not cool and you learn things about pistachios that you never never never never wanted to know oh god make it stop 1:32 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for Android
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    Text - Kris P Kreme @krisv_723 It will NOT make you sound like a maraca if you put marbles up your butt. Live and learn. 7:46 PM · 6/24/20 · Twitter for iPhone
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    Food - when someone tells me not to stir the pot
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    Text - When I have to keep removing my headphones because someone keeps talking to me
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    Hair - Me: Why am I here? My doctor: "Because you have alzheimers." Me: Idon't remember asking you a god damn thing made with mematic
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    Text - WHAT I WORRY ABOUT AT THE AIRPORT What if I miss the flight? What if I a board a wrong flight? What if the flight crashes and I die today? What if I accidently have a bomb in my bag?
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    Text - Ashley Fern O @disco_infern0 my favorite thing to do after ordering food is eating my entire kitchen before it arrives
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    Text - alexandra nikolajev @lexniko it's important to start your day with a routine, especially during quarantine, which is why the first thing i do when i wake up is roll over, bury my face in my pillow and scream f^^^^cccck for three to seven minutes i swear by it best way to start the day!


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