Parents force older siblings to pay for 20-year-old sister's flight to Disney, she refuses to go out of solidarity for siblings: 'My parents are extremely wealthy doctors who own their own business. None of us kids are financially comfortable.'

Manipulation is never cool. Especially if it's coming from somebody in your family. But unfortunately, those are usually the people who are closest to you and therefore know what buttons to press. They know what makes you tick, what makes you uncomfortable, and what motivates you. So if they want something bad enough, they may want to play you like a fiddle to get what they want. But this is never okay. It's not good to use other people like pawns. Most of us know this, of course. 

But that doesn't stop other people from trying to use us. So it's best if we set up a set of defenses against this kind of behavior. The first is identifying when it's happening. We may think our loved ones are just trying to look out for us, so it may take some strangers on the Internet to point out that what they're actually doing is this manipulation. That's what happened to the person in this story. They laid out a complicated situation where a gifted vacation turned out to be a test of sorts. 

Author image for JR Atkinson JR Atkinson
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