'We end up cutting our meal short': Parent defends new girlfriend from tween daughter's accusations

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Remy Millisky • Writer and Editor
Aug 14, 2023 5:00 PM EDT

This parent has a question about their dating life, and they aren't going to like the responses. 

U/sasisgsbseb asked if they're wrong for the way their girlfriend has been treated by their daughter. The whole situation went down when the OP took their 12 year old daughter to lunch with the 47 year old OP's 33 year old GF. "My girlfriend does not particularly like interacting with waiters or waitresses," the OP admitted. While the GF's prior bad experiences with waitstaff might have made her want to avoid them, it's a bad look to assume they'll all always be rude to her. 

OP isn't going to be happy with what the commenters had to say. They were called the jerk for enabling their GF's behavior. The OP's daughter may be young, but even she was concerned enough about the way the GF was treating the waitstaff that she felt the need to speak up. Alongside with leaving a big tip next time they're dining, maybe the OP and their daughter should stick to dining with just the two of them, at least until everything is sorted out with the GF. 

Next up, these people shared the goofiest solutions they've ever seen — that actually solved the problem at hand. 

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  • 01
    Table - 7434 E +P VaR PT 48
    via Igor Rand on Unsplash
  • 02
    Font - AITA for grounding my daughter for calling out how my girlfriend talks to waiters? I've (47) recently begun dating a woman (33) about a month ago, and this week, I arranged for her to meet my daughter (12).
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 03
    Font - We end up going to a restaurant for lunch. My girlfriend does not particularly like interacting with waiters or waitresses- especially those at more casual dining places.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 04
    Font - She's had bad experiences with them, and feels like they often judge her (and other customers) on her/ their food choices. She is also sensitive to entitled attitudes on their part.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 05
    Font - So whenever she goes out with friends or with me, she prefers that someone else place her order for her, and does the rest of the interactions with waitstaff ( handing them the paid bill, asking for utensils/ refills, etc.)
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 06
    Font - So when it comes time to order and the waitress is asking my girlfriend what she wants, my girlfriend looks directly at me and I order for her.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 07
    Human body - My girlfriend wants another fork in the middle of our meal and she asks me to ask the waitress for it.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 08
    Font - So when it comes time to order and the waitress is asking my girlfriend what she wants, my girlfriend looks directly at me and I order for her.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 09
    Human body - My girlfriend wants another fork in the middle of our meal and she asks me to ask the waitress for it.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 10
    Font - This triggers my daughter because the waitress happened to be within earshot and my daughter starts asking my girlfriend why she refuses to acknowledge waitstaff.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 11
    Font - I tell my daughter to be polite but she continues on and says that when the busboy came she could have at least thanked him for taking her soup dish away. She then says "they'll all freaking human beings!" And it came out louder than we all expected, and diners nearby stared at us.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 12
    Font - We end up cutting our meal short because my girlfriend was obviously offended and I drive home with my daughter.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 13
    Font - I told her that this was no way to treat a woman who I love and who I want to be part of our lives. I end up grounding her for embarrassing my girlfriend in front of everybody.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 14
    Font - AITA? My daughter is growing up and needs to learn that not everybody approaches situations how she does. And that it's ignorant to just write them off as rude, or even worse, to raise an issue with them about it.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 15
    Font - Also I have to add that she claims my girlfriend is so rude and idolizes her late mother who would regularly tip 30 percent, yet she is the one who raised her voice in public.
    via u/sasisgsbseb
  • 16
    Font - RedoubtableSouth. Colo-rectal Surgeon [47] YTA. A twelve year old has better manners than your girlfriend, but you're punishing her for it. Your girlfriend needs to grow the h up or quit eating at restaurants with waitstaff. And if that's how your girlfriend treats waitstaff, I'd be concerned about how she might treat your daughter, other family members, or your friends when you're not around. The way people treat those who are "lower" than them, like waiters, says a lot about who they ar
    via u/RedoubtableSouth
  • 17
    Font - judgy_mcjudgypants. Professor Emerita 77] YTA for grounding her. She has a valid point -- remember that people can't read minds, and so your girlfriend's behavior can come off as snobbery (even if unintended on her part). Funny how you're okay with your girlfriend being "sensitive to entitled attitudes" and yet dismissive of your daughter's feelings. Especially since your girlfriend is a recent thing and should not take absolute priority over your daughter.
    via u/judgy_mcjudgypants
  • 18
    Gesture - heysunshinegirl Partas pant [3] YTA, another parent that chooses their partner over their child.
    via u/heysunshinegirl
  • 19
    Font - vball0111 A: YTA Enthusiast [5] Your daughter is right and you're enabling an entitled person. She's victimizing herself while treating others like garbage.
    via u/vball0111

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entitled family drama waiters meal waiter talking restaurant girlfriend family food daughter waitress dining dating Father
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