'You aren't getting your sound cues fast enough? Okay. Run': Prima donna actor gets exactly what he demands, sound designer makes him regret it

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    You aren't getting your sound cues fast enough? Okay. Run, I work as a sound designer for theatre. My job involves finding or making music and sound effects and layering them all together as a cohesive whole. Despite what many people might think, prima donna's aren't really the norm in theatre. It really is a team effort. So many elements
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    have to come together that, if it wasn't, the whole house of cards would fall. I've known many directors choose a less able actor over a better one purely because they were easier to work with. And I've known a couple of exceptional actors left out in the wilderness purely because they were, well, Anyway, I was working on a show with this actor we'll name 'A' (for obs). 'A' was a good actor. Really good. And he knew
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    it. So he had a "wee bit" of an attitude that always made him unpleasant to deal with. Plus, given his ability, he also tended to be lazy, knowing it'd invariably be "alright on the night." This would mean poorly learnt lines and ill-remembered blocking (where you stand), ultimately affecting the entire cast. It was never pleasant working with him. It was dress rehearsal day and we were "topping and tailing". This is
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    basically running the show from cue to cue, leaving out large chunks of dialogue so that the tech team can firm everything up. An actor really has to have a good grasp of the geography of the play to do this. It ain't easy. And 'A' was flailing miserably. Not helped by the post-session head on him from the night before. We got to this one section of the play that was a little more complex than the rest. There were eight or nine really quickfire
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    cues that depended on A's dialogue and position onstage. And 'A' failed miserably. He paced around uncertainly, fired out incorrect pieces of dialogue, and generally looking like a guppy out of the bowl. The rehearsal broke down. Our director, a lovely bloke, stopped the proceedings and asked 'A' if he was okay. "I'm fine" says yer man, "HE'S just not giving me the cues quick
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    enough" dramatically waving his arm in my direction. The director, really only in an effort to plecate yer man, turns to me and says "Pat, would you mind giving 'A' the cues a bit faster, please?" Playing cues is an art form in itself. Playing sfx exactly on cue every time can sound artificial. A cue needs room to breathe. Sometimes, you delay a cue for a second or two just for dramatic effect. And believe you me, a second of silence in a theatre can
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    feel like an eeeettterrrnity, especially when you are fighting every urge in your body to press the play button. Fast cues can be problematic too. Fortunately I did several years in panto where fast cues are the norm. It was a fantastic training ground. You talk to the actors. Remind them that they are the cue, not me. You talk to them about where they'll be and what they will be doing prior to the cue
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    being fired. You even get to the stage where you anticipate firing the cue to make up for the latency (of an order of tens of milliseconds) between pressing the button and the cue firing to get it exact. I know fast cues well. So I was a little angry, and hence the malicious compliance. 'A' had a lot of lines and movement across both ends of the stage to do during this three minute odd section, all while
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    reacting to the sound cues. Normally I would have judged playing the cues to compensate for this effort, giving 'A' a few short beats to adjust after he delivered a line to prepare. Not any more. We started to run the scene again. 'A' hit the first cue. Bang! Just as the last syllable left his mouth I fired the first sfx. Out of place and unprepared, 'A' had to run to his next mark onstage. A got to the mark, delivered the
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    next cue. Bang! Barely had the words left his mouth and we were straight into the next cue. Off his mark again, A ran to the next spot. Bang! Bang! Bang! It went on and on... Constantly getting caught off his marks, 'A' started moving faster and faster, inadvertently speeding up his dialogue in the process, and getting hit with faster and faster cues. It was hilarious, like an old Harold Lloyd.
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    After three minutes, an obviously knackered 'A' was panting heavily. And THEN he had to stay on set and, visibly shaken, finish the rest of the scene. The director looked up at me and smiled broadly.
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    I did the same for the dress rehearsal. And opening night. And the ENTIRE run. Every night. And 'A' couldn't say a thing! Hey, I was only doing what 'A' had asked for. It was glorious thing to watch. I still remember with glee one night during performance when 'A' had just finished that section of the scene. He looked up towards me in the gallery and, breathing heavily, threw me the filthiest, darkest look imaginable.
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    I just smiled. There's an old saying in theatre: don't the techies, they'll always you back. Funnily enough we get in fantastically now. with TL;DR: wants fast. gets fast.
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    trademarked187 I have 1 rule in life. Don't with people who handle your food. Now I have 2
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    Benbored94 Beautiful compliance. Sounds like Belfast area from your language, and having seen some actors (film side through friends), they can sure be complete jockeys
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    CoffeeByIV Hahaha. I can vividly see all of this in my minds eye. I love that the director appreciates your MC. Good job. How did the SM take all of this? I feel as though most SMs likely on board with any form of MC that challenges a problematic actor and doesn't violate equity rules.
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    jm1688 MC for theatre is my favorite kind!
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    Anonassassin666 Tech gang!
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    coolkirk1701 As a techie, i had too many problems with the tech to consider something like this.
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    someenglishguy111 As a specialist fight choreographer I feel your pain and have done similar

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