Woman Dumps Husband After He Demands Paternity Test, Doubting She Could Get Pregnant So Quickly After Marriage

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    r/AITAH ⚫4 hr. ago p1nkribbon AITAH for saying I'm second- guessing having a baby with my husband after he asked for a paternity test?
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    I (26F) and my husband Alex (27M) have been married for a year. Recently, I found out I was pregnant. This was not planned, HOWEVER, ever since we got married we have not been using protection every time we got intimate and I'm currently not on any birth control.
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    My guess is that I'm only a few weeks along (I haven't seen a doctor yet) Anyway, I told him when he got back home. from work yesterday. I personally was very happy about it because I've always wanted a mom. I was pretty sure I was all smiles when
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    I told him, and I thought he would be too once he found out the news. Let me add that he's been neutral on having kids. My assumption was wrong. Immediately he gets super upset and asks how in the this could happen? I explained to him that
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    while it was sudden, we hadn't been using protection every time so it wasn't that surprising. I thought he would have understood. For some reason he didn't. After a few minutes of back and forth, he demanded a
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    paternity test and told me there was no way it was his. I was hurt and insulted. Let me be very clear that I did not, and will never, cheat on my husband. I have also never given him any reason for him to be suspicious about me cheating on him, either.
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    I was so taken aback that he doubted my loyalty enough to ask for a paternity test. I told him I couldn't believe he was seriously asking me for that. He said that I wasn't helping my case, and that if I had nothing to hide, then I would take the test and prove my loyalty to him.
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    I honestly can't remember all that I said, but I ended up saying something along the lines of "if you're doubting me and my loyalty so much that you think I cheated on you and got pregnant with someone else's baby, then I don't think I want one with you anymore. I don't want to be tied to someone who clearly doesn't trust me."
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    He blew up at me and accused me of cheating once again. It was a big argument, and he said I was being, dismissing his concerns, and saying that asking for a paternity test was valid. In the end, I agreed to the test but said that I stood by my words.
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    We haven't spoken since the argument and he's currently at work. I went to my friend for advice and she said that while he was out of line for accusing me of cheating, I shouldn't have said that to him. over one of his "valid" concerns, and that clearly had a reason to feel that way about the situation.
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    I cannot fathom made him feel like I was cheating on him. I was just so hurt that he would insult me like that and accuse me of doing something so disgusting when I thought we were supposed to have trust in each other. But AITA for saying what I did?
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    Edit: A lot of people are suggesting he got a secret vasectomy that failed, and that did cross my mind! During the argument I did ask if he got a vasectomy or was infertile and that's why the baby couldn't be his, but he dismissed that and continued saying "it just couldn't be his" without providing me a solid reason. So in that regard I have really no idea what to say...
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    Edit 2: I feel I should elaborate on the "neutral about kids" part. I told him while we were still just dating that no kids was a dealbreaker for me. He said that was fine because his stance on it was that if we ever have kids, it's fine. if something happens and
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    we don't, it's fine. I'm calling that neutral since I don't know what else to call it. So when I told him I was pregnant I thought he would be fine with it like he said. But apparently he just changed his mind about that and didn't tell me!
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    • Old Hamster_4218 6h ago Has unprotected , wife gets pregnant, "what is the meaning of this!" NTA for sure. ✰ 9.5K 9.5K Reply
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    whimsicaluncertainty • 6h ago NTA. Have you considered he may be projecting? 6.6K Reply
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    4th_chakra • 5h ago A couple of things: • The lack of birth control is both of your responsibility. He wasn't 100% using condoms, and you didn't make him wear condoms. And you weren't 100% using birth control pills. • His lack of trust, one year into your marriage, is appalling. Full stop.
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    • You saying his lack of trust makes you question the marriage itself is completely valid. So while the focus of this seems to be on a pregnancy, it's not. He doesn't trust you, and has accused you of cheating several times in a very short period of time. If it wasn't a pregnancy, it would have been something else, like if you had been out late with your friends, or he tried to make you accountable for your time elsewhere.
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    Which ultimately puts this on him. And it also fundamentally puts your marital future with this person on very shakey ground. My advice? It's good to know early, rather than later in your relationship that you have a serious problem in your marriage with this guy. It's only been a year. There isn't any shame pulling the plug, now that you've scratched beneath his surface and seen him for what he is. NTA
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