Man Refuses to Cancel Vacation for Brother’s Wedding After He Changed the Date, Favoritism Arises When the Family Takes Sides

Author image for Briana Viser
Briana Viser • Writer and Editor
Oct 17, 2024 1:00 PM EDT

Timing is everything, and planning events amongst multiple people means that some people may not be able to come, or it means that it needs a copious amount of time to plan for. Usually for weddings, people give their guests so much time in advance to plan for it to ensure that everyone comes. Attending a wedding may require buying a plane ticket, or a hotel reservation, so it's customary to tell guests months, or even a year in advance. This brings us to the Reddit thread. 

In this Reddit story, a man has planned a vacation with his girlfriend a year in advance. He's booked everything from hotels, flights, and itineraries. His brother is getting married, and though he planned the vacation to be before the wedding, the wedding date was changed and now falls in the middle of the vacation. To the groom's disappointment, the OP refuses to change his vacation date for the wedding, seeing that it was all booked first. The whole family gets involved, but it's time for you to see whose side you're on by reading the full story below. 

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    r/AITAH 20 days ago tooncyberdragon420 AITAH in this situation for not canceling my vacation?
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 02
    AITA for refusing to help my brother after he demanded I cancel my vacation for his wedding?
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 03
    So, I (30M) have an older brother, Mike (34M), who is getting married next month. Here's where the issue starts: I booked a vacation to Italy with my girlfriend over a year ago. This is a trip we've been saving for, and everything is already fully paid— flights, hotels, tours, the whole thing.
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 04
    About six months ago, Mike and his fiancée decided to push up their wedding date because of an issue with the venue. Unfortunately, their new date lands right in the middle of our trip. When Mike first told me, I felt bad and explained to him that rescheduling our trip wasn't really
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 05
    an option since we've already paid for everything, and changing it would cost us a lot of money. He seemed annoyed but didn't push the issue.
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 06
    Last week, though, Mike called me out of the blue and straight- up demanded that I cancel my vacation because "family should always come first." He said that as his only brother, it was my duty to be at his wedding, and missing it would be a huge betrayal. I told him that while I get how important this is, canceling would
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 07
    mean losing thousands of dollars, and I can't afford that.
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 08
    He exploded on me, calling me selfish and saying I care more about a vacation than his wedding. He also said I'd regret this for the rest of my life. He then suggested that since I wouldn't be attending, I should at least help pay for the wedding to make up for it. I told him no. It feels unfair to be guilt-tripped
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 09
    into paying for an event I'm not attending, especially when I didn't cause the conflict in the first place.
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 10
    Now, my family is divided. Some agree that since I booked my vacation first, it's understandable, while others think I'm being an a**hole for not supporting Mike on his big day. Mike hasn't spoken to me since. So, AITAH?
    via u/tooncyberdragon420
  • 11
    Interesting-Wo... •20d ago. Ohh so now he is looking to cash out on it. Ask your brother to pay for the loss you would be bearing for cancelliny. Then you would attend his wedding (because you know family comes first. as per him), if that's what he want. NTA
    via u/Interesting-Wo
  • 12
    bargram • 20d ago • I hate when family pushes their own wishes and/or demands because "family should alsways come first". If family comes first your brother should have chosen a date where you could attend. Probably he messed
    via u/bargram
  • 13
    up his planning and now is holding you responsible. Is this normal behaviour for him? Not taking responsibility for his own actions? If he was offering to reimburse you for the money you will lose if you have to reschedule your trip
    via u/bargram
  • 14
    you might consider doing so, but instead he is demanding money from you for not being able to attend? The audacity is astonishing. Go to Italy and have a wonderful time. NTA
    via u/bargram
  • 15
    . Acrobatic_Passi... • 20d ago • NTA. If he really wants u there, he can pay u the losses u will be incurring. U don't owe him ………...
    via u/Acrobatic_Passi
  • 16
    -Imagine-_-Rea... 20d ago. ΝΤΑ Your vacation was clearly booked first and he knew about that. It kinda feels like he last minute pushed for it, knowing you can't cancel now, to get some extra
    via u/-Imagine-_-Rea
  • 17
    money from you by guilt tripping you
    via u/-Imagine-_-Rea
  • 18
    74Magick 20d ago • Tell him and anyone else who wants to run their mouth to kiss your entire Go on your vacation, keep your money, and have a great time. NTA
    via u/74Magick
  • 19
    ieya404 20d ago • He chose to move his wedding date to a date he knew you were unavailable. That makes him the when he then demands you attend his wedding anyway.
    via u/ieya404
  • 20
    I'd give him two choices; he either accepts that you're not there and deals with it, or he and whines about it and you'll make it very clear to everyone concerned that he picked a date when he knew you were committed to an expensive holiday, and that
    via u/ieya404
  • 21
    his poor planning is not your fault, and he can look like an arrogant wedding. NTA. at his own
    via u/ieya404
  • 22
    therealzacchai • 20d ago • Right. Family DOES come first -- not a venue. Which is the only reason he changed his wedding date to one you are not available. Your brother's priorities are out of whack.
    via u/therealzacchai
  • 23
    • Ravens-Mind 20d ago • NTA. If family always comes first, where was that consideration when they chose to plan their wedding on your vacation week?
    via u/Ravens-Mind
  • 24
    He's also trying to manipulate you into giving them money. Their lack of foresight and planning is not an emergency on your part.
    via u/Ravens-Mind

Tags

family drama drama siblings family feud relationships wedding lol love family reddit thread Reddit funny dating brothers
Scroll Down For The Next Article