Cat mom refuses to exile cat to her parents’ house 1.5 hours away so her best friend can host a birthday party at her house: ‘There's just no way’

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Feb 5, 2025 8:00 PM EST

Ladies don't mess around when it comes to their prized pets—especially cat moms. Society doesn't call us crazy cat ladies for nothing! The last thing a cat mom would ever dream of is leaving their cat in a home an hour and a half away because their best friend wants to throw a party at her place. Not only would that make the cat mom have major separation anxiety from her feline bestie, but she'd also be excusing her best friend's entitled behavior and giving in to her self-important requests.

The cat mother in this story refuses to let her entitled BFF tell her what she should do with her cat. Her best friend insisted that she host her own birthday party at the cat mom's house because she has more space—fine, that's a bit weird to ask, but fine. Now, though, the best friend insists she takes her cat to her parents' place an hour and a half away because one of her invitees is allergic. Even when the cat mom tries to remedy the situation with compromises, her "bestie" starts bad-mouthing her and really shows how ungrateful she actually is. See how the story unfolds below.

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  • "I told her that I had no obligation to let her do the party at my house and I kindly accepted to do so, so the least she could do was to be grateful."
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    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.
     

  • The two women have been friends since high school, and her best friend's 25th birthday is coming up. You'd think that after almost 10 years as friends, her best friend would understand how to speak to her friend with respect and set realistic expectations for their duties to one another. It's one thing to ask your friend if you can use their place to host a party, but it's a completely different ballpark to almost demand that they remove their cat from the premises so you can have your moment. The party-goer can take a Claritin or not come at all—this is not the cat mom's problem!

  • I (24f) have been friends with a girl that I'll call Hayley (24f) since high school. For a few years. we didn't get to see each other much because we went to college on
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  • opposite sides of the country, but I moved to her city last year so we really got to catch up with each other.
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  • Hayley will be turning 25 in a week so we - along with some other friends - started planning her birthday party a while ago. She wanted to have
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  • a rather big party so that she could invite all of her friends groups, but we couldn't find anywhere to have it and she lives in a small apartment. I on the
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  • other hand have a house, it's not that big but it's big enough to host the party. So our friends started bringing it up and said that we could throw the party at my house.
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  • I was fine with that. I did find it kinda weird that they were the one to bring it up, because I personally wouldn't suggest throwing a party
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  • in someone else's house unless they were the one to suggest it, but it didn't really matter. So I said yes, my only conditions were that the party didn't
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  • turn into chaos, that no one got too drink, and that they helped me clean up the next day. Everyone. was fine with that so we agreed on it.
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  • Yesterday, Hayley sent me a text to tell me how many people would be there. That's when she asked me if I could get my cat out of the house
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  • for the night, because one of her friends from college is allergic. I told her that I didn't have anywhere else to leave him, but that I could make sure that he stayed
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  • upstairs while we were downstairs. I also told her that my cat is very shy and easily scared so there's no way he'd get close to her friend.
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  • She then told me that I could just leave him with my parents and then go back to get him the next day. My parent's house is about an hour and a half
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  • drive and there's just no way I'd drive a total of 6 hours in one weekend. I told her that it really wasn't possible for me to leave him with my parents
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  • but that he would be locked upstairs and I'd deep clean the house to make sure there's no cat hair anywhere. I also told. her that she should've
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  • told me earlier and I could've found another solution, but now the party is in less than a week.
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    via Blake Cheek

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • She told me that I wasn't being helpful and that I was ruining her party, and she's been about me to a lot of our mutual friends. I told her that I
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  • had no obligation to let her do the party at my house and I kindly accepted to do so, so the least she could do was to be grateful. She hasn't.
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  • replied since. Most of our friends agree with me, but I also feel a bit guilty. I don't know if I'm in the wrong here and I don't know what else I can do.
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  • Traditional_Bid_5... NTA. The party is canceled and you need to tell her now. The fact she is bad mouthing you shows how ungrateful she is.
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  • demon803 NTA, she and you do know that even a deep clean will not take away all the cat debris and anyone with an allergy usually cannot be in a house that a cat has been in EVER. My mom reacts in under 30 minutes even in rooms that the cat has not been in, cat dander flies.
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friendship cat aita birthdays friendship advice allergic entitlement allergies birthday birthday party friends askreddit reddit story aio friend entitled people karma feline entitled allergy reddit thread r-entitled Reddit Cats entitled people friendship feud
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