Generous parents buy 33-year-old daughter a house, her 32-year-old husband demands to be on the deed despite barely contributing financially to house or new baby expenses: "[He] has shown limited interest in helping"

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Ely Bulnes • Writer and Editor
May 13, 2025 4:00 PM EDT

In theory, a couple should be composed of two individuals that function as a team. That doesn't mean that everything should be split perfectly evenly; everyone has things that they excel in and areas in life where they tend to fall short. This goes for all aspects of a shared life: chores, finances, intimacy. If one person is struggling, the other should be able to pick up the slack. However, both should work towards figuring out a solution for the long-term.

In our story today, our protagonist's husband is slacking when it comes to contributing to cost of living. Shouldering the brunt of living expenses is already enough on any individual in a couple, but with a new baby, our protagonist is feeling pretty weighed down. Her generous parents help her by buying her a new house, but things turn sour when her husband demands to have his name on the deed as well. Scroll down to make your own judgement call on this situation. 

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  • 01

    AITA for wanting to divorce my husband after demanding to be on the deed of the house my parents bought only 5 months ago?

    Cheezburger Image 10504631040
    via RDNE Stock project from Pexels
  • 02
    I (33F) have been married to my husband (32M) since November 2023. My parents bought us a house using equity from their own home and paid cash for it (5months ago). The title is in my mom's
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 03
    name and mine, and we're essentially paying them back for helping us out. They did this to give us a stable foundation for our family, especially for our son (who I will refer to as "my son" for privacy).
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 04
    Now, my husband is demanding to be added to the deed of the house, but I don't think that's fair. He has only been contributing minimally to the home and family finances. He's had multiple jobs over the last
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 05
    few months, and there were times I had to cover his share of rent when he was between jobs. I also ended up having to pay for all of the wedding and buy all the baby's things on my own, while he contributed very little.
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 06
    TRANS 6 WARRANTY CONTRACT EVELITY: REMENT Party
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  • 07
    The problem is that my parents have made it clear that the equity in the house is not to be touched, as it is meant to be used to pay off the rest of their home. This is something I've agreed to and
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 08
    respected, but now my husband is insisting that unless he's added to the deed, he won't pay his portion of the house expenses. This feels manipulative to me, especially since he hasn't financially contributed in a meaningful way.
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 09
    I've tried to come up with solutions, like working together to build his credit and pay off his debts, so we can get a house in both our names in the future. But he wants ownership now, and it's putting a lot of strain on me emotionally, especially since I'm also going through cancer treatment and juggling my family's care.
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 10
    My parents have been a huge help, providing full- time daycare for our son, which has saved us a lot of money. I trust them to care for him, and they've been our backbone. My husband has only shown limited interest in helping, and his actions have made things harder for me.
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 11
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    via Monkey Business Images
  • 12
    So, AITA for deciding to divorce him after demanding. he be put on the deed when we've only been married for a few months, and he hasn't contributed financially?
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937

  • It's already hard enough to be a new mom, but having to deal with a man-child like this would drive anyone crazy. 

  • 13
    grayblue_grrl He wants half YOUR property. 3 months in this has no value. It is the cheapest time to divorce him, I would think.
    via u/grayblue_grrl
  • 14
    sallystruthers69 He has a history of changing jobs, or flat-up not having one, and now has the audacity to start making demands about the deed to the house? Making threats that he won't pay anything more until you add him?? Absolutely not! Divorce this guy.
    via u/sallystruthers69
  • 15
    The house is to remain in you and your mother's names. Hopefully you will be able to set up a trust with it as well so he can't try to steal half of it. He sounds like a money hungry, grubby swindler.
    via u/sallystruthers69
  • 16
    Prestigious-Pear937 OP Yes thank you. I just needed confirmation that I am not crazy thinking he is trying to take everything my family built.
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 17
    Cheezburger Image 10504631808
    via AndreyPopov
  • 18
    Niboomy He makes threats about not paying and I'm like: "Sir, you're already missing many payments...?" where's the threat about that, that OP may spend less money in groceries because he is gone?
    via u/Niboomy
  • 19
    anneofred Shouldn't be an issue as it sounds like it's a premarital asset, and should for sure stay that way given his actions, or lack of.
    via u/anneofred
  • 20
    chameleon-qu r Not to mention he was already not paying to begin with. OP admits she's had to cover his portion already.
    via u/chameleon-qu
  • 21
    definitelytheA I'm wondering if just signing over her part of the deed back to her mom might be a good idea. NAL, but is this marital property at this point?
    via u/definitelytheA
  • 22
    Pleasant-Koala147 You realise he'll be forced to contribute if you separate and put him on child support. It sounds like you're twisting yourself in knots to make a relationship work with this man while he puts no effort in and makes demands. That's not a
    via u/Pleasant-Koala147
  • 23
    partnership. Is that really how you want to spend the rest of your life? Is this the model for a relationship that you want your son to grow up with? NTA, but you really need to stop focusing on this relationship and start focusing on you and your son.
    via u/Pleasant-Koala147
  • 24
    nitro1432 If he doesn't want to pay he can be evicted and I believe legally your parents can do that.
    via u/nitro1432
  • 25
    revveduplikeaduece86 The demand of immediacy to me, suggests the expectation of longevity is missing. What's the rush dude?
    via u/revveduplikeaduece86
  • 26
    I take money out of my house (put debt on my back) to give my kid a house, technically, I should be the only one on the deed to that house. Out of a wish to avoid probate, it makes sense to put my kid on there. But putting their spouse on the deed? It complicates me recovering my equity. Why do we have to do this?
    via u/revveduplikeaduece86
  • 27
    Prestigious-Pear937 OP Thank you I appreciate this. He doesn't realize how many people who kill to have a house given to them pretty much
    via u/Prestigious-Pear937
  • 28
    Trick_Few Your parents knew what they were doing when they didn't automatically put your future ex-husband's name on the deed. That was a smart move on their part.
    via u/Trick_Few
  • 29
    If he doesn't want to be an ex-husband, he needs to make some life changes. It's time for an ultimatum because everything has fallen on your shoulders which is highly unfair. Your husband needs to grow up and learn how to adult.
    via u/Trick_Few

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family drama marriage AITAH toxic homeowner wife married life relationships husband couples divorce love family breakup red flag married relationship drama
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