Selfish roommate keeps allowing her guests to bring their dogs over without asking for permission, forcing her roommate, who owns a cat who's spooked by dogs, to confront her: 'It's confusing and scary for him'

When it comes to roommates, we think that it is very important to set ground rules from the get-go, especially when there are animals involved. For example, the pet owner cleans after their pet and doesn't demand that their roommates do it. The pet owner pays the pet rent and doesn't force their roommates to pay it. If one of the roommates is allergic to cats or dogs, then the other roommates must respect that. That's how it should be, but it pretty much never works that way, huh?

But when boundaries were not set properly in the first place, who's fault is it? Well, in this story, we think that it's the dog owner's fault. Sure, the cat owner should have said something in the beginning and didn't allow this to go on for as long as it did. But the dog owner should have had the common decency to ask whether it was okay for other people to bring their pets over.

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"[Am I wrong] for asking my roommate not to have guests bring their dog over?"

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Look, as much as we can say that this is something that should have been discussed in advance, and boundaries should have been put in place about these things… at the end of the day, the only decent thing to do, as the roommate, is to ask. The fact that she didn't do even that is not right.
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Either way, confronting her about it was not a bad thing to do. Maybe the timing was weird, since you have been allowing it to happen for a while, but that doesn't matter. You're thinking about your cat and your cat's well-being, which is what you should be doing, and it's better late than never.
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