funny twitter

Advertisement

kids describe their parents jobs in funny twitter thread | thumbnail Text - Household Government @LadyBugAssassin My friend's daughter was asked by her teacher what does her mother do for a living. Miss thing said move papers around and talk on the phone. My friend is a judge. 9 11:03 PM Oct 19, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 14.8K Retweets 678 Quote Tweets 130.5K Likes >

Kids Describing Their Parent's Jobs: Funny Twitter Thread

funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - Rhyming Mama @sarabellab123 I'm writing a book. It's called, "I Wasn't Gonna Drink Tonight But." My children are my inspiration. 7:16 AM Dec 5, 2020 - Twitter for iPhone 120 Retweets 10 Quote Tweets 1.1K Likes >

Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (December 6, 2020)

Advertisement

funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - Lauren Flans @LaurenFlans the orphan i adopted sucks at chess fml 8:07 AM Nov 13, 2020 · Twitter for Android 20.7K Retweets 2.1K Quote Tweets 293.5K Likes >

Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (November 15, 2020)

funniest relationship tweets of the week | Thumbnail Text - Lady Lawya @Parkerlawyer Husband, "I'm going to the store, do you need anything?" Me, "A bottle of champagne." Husband, "Oh, I got you one yesterday." Me, "I said what I said." 11:56 PM Nov 5, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 139 Retweets 8 Quote Tweets 1.5K Likes <.

Funniest Relationship Tweets of The Week (November 13, 2020)

funniest women tweets we came across this week | thumbnail Text - Rachel @femaleredhead "are you ok?" no, the sun is setting before 5pm 12:07 AM Nov 3, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 18.5K Retweets 479 Quote Tweets 57.8K Likes >

Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (November 9, 2020)

Advertisement

funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - Village Person @SvnSxty when l'm having a bad day as a parent, I just remind myself that plenty of animals won't hesitate to eat their kids, so really I'm in gold star territory 2:32 AM Nov 2, 2020 · Twitter for Android 244 Retweets 13 Quote Tweets 1.1K Likes >

Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (November 8, 2020)

funny tweets about wearing only black regardless of the season | thumbnail Text - Text - Daniel Howell @danielhowell one day i aspire to wear so much black that i simply turn into an event horizon that destroys everything i pass 2:50 AM · Aug 15, 2018 · Twitter for iPhone 11.8K Retweets 414 Quote Tweets 71.2K Likes >

Relatable Tweets About Wearing All Black, Whatever The Season

funniest dad tweets of the week | Text - Dad on my Feet @dad_on_my_feet 000 My kid left a car light on overnight so this morning my battery was dead, which reminded me the importance of life-lessons like jump- starting an engine, keeping an emergency kit handy, and above all else, proper use of birth control

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week

Advertisement

funniest women tweets we came across this week | Text - Rachel @femaleredhead god (creating me): here's the ability to be funny sometimes me: omg thank you! so i guess i'll be pretty happy then god: LOL wow, you are funny

Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (October 26, 2020)

man complains on Twitter that he can't get a date despite having 700lbs. of beef a year | thumbnail Text - Dangerously Beefy @vickers_stephen 000 My housing is paid for. I make a good salary. I get health insurance, 401k, 700 Ibs of beef a year, and I live on a couple hundred acres. I'm a puncher by trade with a bachelors degree. And I swear you women would rather have a loser than a provider. It's sad

Man With 700lbs. Of Beef Can't Get A Date: Funny Twitter Thread

collection of this week's best and most popular animal tweets thumbnail two pictures including a white cat with big ankles and a zoomed in photo of the same cat's ankles 'Cat - ERICKA @Erickajamon Chonky cat cankles 11:51 PM · Oct 16, 2020 · Twitter for Android 72K Retweets 2.1K Quote Tweets 346.6K Likes'

Weekly Treat: Animal Tweets (October 19th, 2020)

Mariel Ruvinsky

Advertisement

comebacks | tweet by abby @abbypauline been 7 car accidents this year, y'all can't tell God doesr have plan senpai @jasminsenju Girl sound like he tryna kill u

Clever Comebacks That Deserve A Plaque For Their Spice

funniest dad tweets of the week | Text - Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix What I say: Be ready, we are leaving in five minutes. What the child hears: Get undressed. Start finger painting. Lose at least one shoe.

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (October 13, 2020)

funniest dad tweets of the week - Text - Simon Holland @simoncholland Why would I pay for a haunted house when I can wake up to my kid silently standing by my bed at 5 AM.

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week

Advertisement

funniest dad tweets of the week - Text - Text - James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn Me: It's National Daughter Day. 8-year-old: What did you get me? Me: Nothing. It's not a gift-giving holiday. 8: I'll remember that on Father's Day

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (September 29, 2020)

funny infographic showing women's average height in each country | thumbnail - Text - Text - Sabah Ibrahim @reina_sabah As an Indian woman, I can confirm that too much of my time is spent hiding behind a rock praying the terrifying gang of international giant ladies and their Latvian general don't find me

Ridiculous Pictograph Of Average Female Height Per Country: Funny Twitter Thread

Trending Now

Employee asks girlfriend to take son to school so he can start work early, dismisses her when she gets a warning about attendance from her boss

Employee asks girlfriend to take son to school so he can start work early, dismisses her when she gets a warning about attendance from her boss

New neighbor aims trail camera at Grandfather's house, homeowner wants to avoid discussion with neighbor

New neighbor aims trail camera at Grandfather's house, homeowner wants to avoid discussion with neighbor

'There was a huge surprise waiting in the bed': Friendly stray cat shows up at a home and surprises the family by giving birth to four tiny kittens overnight

'There was a huge surprise waiting in the bed': Friendly stray cat shows up at a home and surprises the family by giving birth to four tiny kittens overnight

22 Caffeinated Pictures of Cats Craving a Cozy Cup of Catpuccino

22 Caffeinated Pictures of Cats Craving a Cozy Cup of Catpuccino

Employee hands boss their two weeks' notice, only for boss to demand they stay for longer, employee refuses: ‘You should be glad I'm giving you this’

Employee hands boss their two weeks' notice, only for boss to demand they stay for longer, employee refuses: ‘You should be glad I'm giving you this’

36 of the Funniest and Freshest Feline Tweets to Fill Your Week With Pawsitivity (March 16, 2026)

36 of the Funniest and Freshest Feline Tweets to Fill Your Week With Pawsitivity (March 16, 2026)

Advertisement