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    Uncle buys his 13-year-old nephew an entire gaming setup to get payback on his sister's childish boyfriend, forging core memories while the manchild fumes: ‘I didn't plan to go as far as I did, [but] it felt so good’
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    'She cannot be trusted': Wary daughter refuses to give her baby's birth certificate to her mother so she can open a bank account for him, suspects an attempt at fraud
  • parenting tweets

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    Thread: People Criticize Moms That Take Pride in Their Own Needless Suffering

    Author image for Mel Dawn Mel Dawn
    funny tweets from sarcastic moms who are done with parenting | thumbnail Katie Didn't ... @Pork_Chop_Hair [back at work after being a stay-at-home parent for many years] Me: alright, before this meeting starts, I want everyone to go pee. I don't care if you don't feel it, you need to try. 5:53 PM · Jun 16, 2019 · Twitter for iPhone 1,766 Retweets 70 Quote Tweets 10.5K Likes

    Sarcastic Tweets From Moms Who Are Done With Parenting

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
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    funny parenting memes relatable to anyone with kids | thumbnail text - when the doorbell rings in the middle of bathtime Raw Motherhood @MetteAngerhofer Parenting hack: Tell much lamer bedtime stories than spouse so children will ask them instead every night.

    Parenting Memes For The Exhausted Parents Out There

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
    funniest dad tweets of the week | Thumbnail Font - Average Dad @Average_Dad1 ... Just saw my toddler holding a pillow over the face of her teddy bear while whispering "night night". I'm worried for my safety. 8:19 PM Jan 30, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 103 Retweets 6 Quote Tweets 600 Likes

    Dad Tweets That Are A Hoot And A Half

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
    Parenting Tweets That Nearly Made Us Spit Out Our Coffee From Chuckles| Thumbnail text - Marissa ... @michimama75 5: I'm bad at this puzzle Me: you're trying your best! Mommy has a hard time with that one too! 5: yeah, because you're bad at it 7:02 PM · 1/16/22 · Twitter for iPhone

    Parenting Tweets That Nearly Made Us Spit Out Our Coffee From Chuckles

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    funny tweets about the realities of fitness for parents | thumbnail text - Arianna Bradford ... @thearibradford I pulled a muscle and got floaters in my eyes from trying to show my kids how to do a cartwheel so I won't be selling my at-home fitness program after all. 5:00 AM - Apr 26, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 72 Retweets 407 Likes

    Funny Tweets About The Realities Of Fitness For Parents

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    funniest dad tweets of the week | Thumbnail text - James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn @XplodingUnicorn Parenting is praising your 5-year-old like they won a Nobel Prize because they woke up in the middle of the night and got 100 percent of their puke in the toilet. 5:10 PM · May 29, 2021 · Twitter for Android 111 Retweets 11 Quote Tweets 4,412 Likes

    Funniest Tweets From Dads Who Nailed Parenting This Week

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    Parenting Tweets That Had Us Entering 2022 With A Laugh| thumbnail text - MumlnBits @MumlnBits so turns out my kids still expect to be fed in 2022 10:44 PM · Jan 1, 2022 · Twitter for iPhone

    Parenting Tweets That Had Us Entering 2022 With A Laugh

    Author image for Mayarey Mayarey
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    People Tweet The Coolest Perks They Got Due To Their Parent's Occupation| thumbnail text -Aaron Wudrick D O @awudrick Replying to @causalinf My mom was a librarian. So I never had to pay any late fees for overdue books. 8:55 PM · 5/15/21 · Twitter for Android 5 Retweets 3 Quote Tweets 192 Likes

    People Tweet The Coolest Perks They Got Due To Their Parent's Occupation

    Author image for Mayarey Mayarey
    funny memes about daughters being dramatic and full of sass | thumbnail text -

    Memes About Daughters Being Dramatic And Full Of Sass

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
    kids being serious | thumbnail text - ElizaR @ElizaReynick Replying to @AliceTaylorM and @lifeattiffanys When my son was 3, I picked him up from pre-school one day, and he very somberly said, "What if that song is right, and life IS but a dream? Are we just in a dream right now?" Existential crisis brought on by "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" 5:09 AM · Dec 13, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone

    10 Times Kids Were Scary Serious

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    Parenting Tweets Which We Highly Identified With This Christmas Season| thumbnail text - That Mom Tho @mom_tho thoughts and prayers for my husband as our five year old looked him straight in the eyes and told him "your jokes aren't funny" 1:23 AM · Dec 6, 2021

    Parenting Tweets Which We Highly Identified With This Christmas Season

    Author image for Mayarey Mayarey
    Funny Rants From Parents About How Useless It Is To Yell At Their Kids | thumbnail text - WTFDAD ... @daddydoubts It's important not to yell at your children. Even if you're frustrated it's our responsibility to- FOR F'. CKS SAKE I TOLD YOU A THOUSAND TIMES DONT EAT RASPBERRIES ON THE COUCH THEY STAIN GODDAMN IT -remain calm and be the voice of reason. 4:58 PM · Aug 28, 2019 Twitter for iPhone

    Funny Rants From Parents About How Useless It Is To Yell At Their Kids

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
    Spot-On Tweets About The 'Joys' Of Raising Twins| thumbnail text - Robert Knop @FatherWith Twins I have my twins 50% convinced they are actually triplets, and the third triplet is a vampire that lives in the attic 2:33 PM · Apr 8, 2019 89

    Spot-On Tweets About The 'Joys' Of Raising Twins

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    funny tweets about the grudges kids and parents hold against each other | thumbnail text -  todd dillard ... @toddedillard asked my 5-year-old what she wanted for dinner and she said "not a burned quesadilla" bc in the summer of 2019 I overcooked one side of her quesadilla 12:20 AM - Mar 4, 2021 - Twitter for iPhone 47.3K Retweets 4,896 Quote Tweets 724.8K Likes

    Funny Tweets About The Grudges Parents And Kids Hold Against Each Other

    Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
    15 Savage Kid Quotes That Have Us Cracking Up| Thumbnail text - Smile - My 13 year old cousin asked my boyfriend (who's a teacher) how he "sleeps at night knowing he's given people homework" 6:13 PM · 10/26/21 · Twitter for iPhone 57.2K Retweets 3,586 Quote Tweets 58OK Likes

    15 Savage Kid Quotes That Have Us Cracking Up

    Author image for LiterallyLily17 LiterallyLily17
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    22-year-old employee refuses to respond to work messages after 8 PM because her boss got angry she didn't respond to his message at 11:40 PM: 'He said I should stay on top of communication if I want to grow.'

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    Job candidate logs onto Zoom interview early and overhears that an offer has already been made, proceeds to call them out: 'Hey guys, just so you know, I can hear you!'

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