-
01
Clumsy burglars be like:
"If you came here to kill me clap your hands…"
-
02
How those videos of guys hitting on girls would go if they were ugly...
"Are you trying to assault me?!"
-
03
When you use too much brake cleaner:
"If you come in and see me like this just run…….."
-
04
When you forgot your little cousin was sleeping over:
Sorry cuz…
-
05
The influencer patient:
"…Is she live??"
-
06
When she quiet the whole ride:
She's silently piling up everything she wants to yell at you about.
-
07
If they had Snapchat back in the 1860s:
"American so great man, maiking this monay!"
-
08
When the morning radio personally attacks you:
Best song marketing ever!
-
09
Person who just quit their job in tech:
"I still can't believe I quit a lucrative high six figure job in tech after working in tech for almost tech years… I'll love the freedom of living off my modest $5.3 million nest egg…"
-
10
Employee Harassment Day:
"You're bad at this job—hell, you're bad at your whole life!"
-
11
The first time anyone ever ate an egg:
"I'm pretty sure that poo has a little baby inside…"
-
12
Hispanic Dads on Their Day Off:
There are dad who are able to relax on their day off and then there are dads who need to get every single chore on their housework list done.
-
13
Paying with a "Mystery Bag"
"I could give you the $3.75 or I could give you this mystery bag!"
-
14
Dinosaurs Vibin:
They all had big plans for the future and it all came crumbling with one rock from space…
-
15
No electronics at the dinner table:
"Silly me! You heard her grandma, no electronics!" *unplugs grandma*
-
16
Weird saying be used for the first time:
"Goodnight! Don't let the bed bugs bite!"
"Y'ALL GOT F***ING BED BUGS!" -
17
People who get a full 8 hrs sleep vs people who stayed up all night grinding for runes on Elden Ring
Who needs sleep? Gotta get them runes!
-
18
Stranger Things Alternate Ending:
001: "Papa bad, we leave"
11: "Alright."
THE END -
19
What the driver sees during a DUI demonstration:
"But officer, you were doing the worm too…"
-
20
Someone explains the the NASA images to me:
bla bla bla "no, keep looking!" bla bla bla