Twitter Thread

Insecure woman claims that finding celebrities attractive while in a relationship counts as cheating: 'If they call a celebrity hot, they will call a random person in the street hot'

Ally Perry

Discriminatory elementary school awards kids for 100% attendance with ice cream van, forces the rest of the class to go without on a hot summer's day: 'They spend more time working out how to punish kids than teach them'

Ally Perry

Parents ponder the stigma of feeding kids 'hidden vegetables': 'I don't really like plain steamed vegetables either'

Ally Perry

Strident woman accuses elderly widower of profiting off his late wife's free labor for their flower garden: 'I hope to God individuals like yourself actually experience happiness for once'

Ally Perry

Enthusiastic DIYers receive family heirloom rocking chair, controversially decide to refurbish it instead of continuing tradition: 'This is why everyone hates millennials'

Ally Perry

Drivers and non-drivers debate why people shame teenagers for not getting their license: 'If public transportation was accessible, many people wouldn't'

Emmy Pratt

Woman receives support after getting chastisted for jumping rope in driveway: 'I hope she starts a jump roping club in her front yard'

Ally Perry

Picky manchild gets judged for forcing wife to cook him a separate dinner: 'Imagine how much her family hates him'

Ally Perry

Zoomer amuses Millennials by romanticizing kitschy 2000s kitchen decor: 'Tuscan-maxxing is better than being Millennial grey backsplash-pilled'

Ally Perry

Crunchy mom horrifies with refusal to get her newborn child a birth certificate: 'This + homeschooling = entire lost generation'

Ally Perry

'It's called having a party': Non-imbibers bemoan the social pressure to have an open bar wedding, get roasted in the replies

JR Atkinson

Woman accuses mom of traumatizing her kids by serving them a weekly charcuterie board for dinner: 'When I look back at Charcuterie Tuesdays, I see the gaslighting'

Emmy Pratt

Excited mom-to-be announces pregnancy, faces husband's unenthused reaction: 'She bouta be a single married mom'

Ally Perry

People debate the right for homeowning seniors to live in large family homes: 'If you're in your 70s and sitting on a 4 bedroom house, I think you should be disincentivized to holding onto it'

Ally Perry

Galaxy-brained poster claims that nobody with an 130+ IQ listens to music: 'This is a lot of words to say you don't understand music'

Ally Perry

'Don't let sunk costs trap you': No-regrets adults share tales of backing out on their already-paid-for weddings

JR Atkinson